


Snowhere To Run, Snowhere To Hide

by CaptainDodge



Category: The Loud House (Cartoon)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Supernatural Elements, Murder
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-01
Updated: 2019-12-25
Packaged: 2021-01-16 01:08:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 23,054
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21262601
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CaptainDodge/pseuds/CaptainDodge
Summary: Snow Way Out AU. What if Hops had never accompanied Lana to the Burpin' Burger for the contest? What if she'd left on her own to seek help? What if she didn't come back until the next morning? What if something... strange... happened to the other Louds while she was gone?





	1. Quiet As Night

Lana Loud tossed yet another icicle out of Vanzilla’s blocked engine, listening to it shatter on the ground behind her and trying to ignore the cold biting into her skin all over. Winter had come with a vengeance this year – according to Patchy Drizzle, the coldest on record – so her siblings had better appreciate her working outside in the cold, while they got to relax inside!

When she stopped to think about it, this was kind of her repayment for their help in winning the contest for her. Just earlier that day, the Burpin’ Burger had held a contest, with the winner getting to become a (honorary) member of Lana’s favorite racecar driver, Bobbie Fletcher’s pit crew. (Lana didn’t know what “honorary” meant, but she figured that it was something with lots of honor.) Getting the winning wrapper was no easy task – not stealing back the “kids eat free” coupon that Lana had used to buy the first round of burgers, nor scrounging up enough money to buy a third round after she tried and failed to steal back the coupon a third time – but with enough persistence, and a small helping of gluttony, the Louds had managed to find it. Lana’s celebration was premature, however – as Lisa had attempted to point out earlier, the huge amounts of snowfall had left the Loud siblings trapped in the Burpin’ Burger. But Lana was never one to give up – especially with a prize like _this_ on the line!

And so, she dug a way out of the building and to their family van, and now stood toiling outside in the freezing temperatures, trying to make it operational again.

Despite the cold, Lana found herself sweating from the labor, and wiped off her brow, huffing. She wondered what Hops, her faithful frog companion, would say if he were here right now. After a moment, she shook her head. _Probably nothing,_ she thought,_ since he’d be DEAD – what with the cold, and him being cold-blooded and all…_

With that, she resumed working. As she peeked around the engine, looking for any other obstructions that might impede the van’s function, she found a particularly large chunk of ice wedged into the engine, probably from when Lori had attempted to turn it over when they first dug Vanzilla out. Sighing, she began chipping at the blockage diligently, and bit by bit, the ice chipped away. As she did so, however, Lana noticed a strange hissing sound and stopped, looking around to see what might be causing it, or what it might mean. She also noticed an almost imperceptible… _sinking_ sensation, though she didn’t know what to make of it.

Perhaps the problem was outside the engine block? Lana pushed herself out of the engine compartment, and the snow crunched beneath her feet as she landed on it. Walking around to the side of the van, she was surprised to see local gas station owner Flip leaning against it, looking smug.

“Flip?” Lana said.

“Evenin’, chief,” Flip said, inspecting his fingernails in a half-hearted attempt at looking casual.

“What are you doing here?”

Flip shrugged. “Ah, was just in the neighborhood, diggin’ more poor suckers outta the snow fer a fee, when I thought I’d swing back ‘round, see if you were willin’ ta reconsider my offer – which still stands, by the way.” He looked up at Lana, a wicked gleam in his eyes. “One winnin’ wrapper, one ride home. How ‘bout it?”

Lana dug the wrapper out of her pocket and looked at it. This was it – this was her ticket to the big leagues. With this wrapper, she could start working her way up –pit crew today, maybe racecar driver tomorrow. She could be rich and famous, doing her family proud. To her, this wrapper was a _dream._

To Flip, it was only quick, easy cash.

Lana closed her eyes, then held out the wrapper. “You can have this wrapper…”

With a grin that could spoil fresh milk, Flip walked up with his hand outstretched – but just as he was about to take the wrapper, Lana yanked her hand back, shooting him a fiery glare.

“…when you pry it from my _cold, dead fingers.”_

Flip’s face twisted into a sneer. _“…Hm._ Suit yerself, chief,” he said with a shrug, though Lana knew her slight meant more to him than that. He turned around, banging on the side of Vanzilla with his fist. “But I’d like to see ya roll outta here in _this_ hunk o’ junk!”

Lana folded her arms. _“Hmph!_ She might not look like much, but she’s been running for over 80 years, and as long as _I_ have anything to say about it, she ain’t stopping now!” she said, patting the van proudly.

Flip snorted. “Yeah, well, can’t say I’ve ever seen a van drive down the road with _four flats!”_

“Huh? Flats…?” Lana’s eyes widened. She zipped from corner to corner of Vanzilla, inspecting every tire to find that each one was completely deflated. “Wha –? What the –?” Her eyes lit up with realization, and she pointed at Flip, now clambering back into his snow plow. _“You!_ You slashed all the tires, you _jerkface!”_

Flip chuckled. “Well, now, missy, it ain’t nice to be goin’ ‘round throwin’ accusations like _that_ ‘round without evidence…!” He laughed again, the sound grating on Lana’s ears. “Betcha wish ya’d taken me up on my offer _now,_ don’t ya?”

As Flip burst into another round of laughter, Lana gritted her teeth and pulled out the wrapper again, waving it at him. “You’re_ never _getting this wrapper, Flip! _You hear me? NEVER!”_

Flip started up his plow, having to shout over the engine’s roar. “Well, then ya’d better hope someone more charitable comes along, chief – and _soon!_ It’s gettin’ awfully dark… and awfully _cold…”_

Flip’s cold laughter sounded through the colder air as he backed up, swept around, and pushed more snow onto Vanzilla as Lana was forced to jump out of the way. Lana could do nothing more than shake her fist at him in impotent fury as he drove away, then stare at the half-buried van in front of her. Her heart sank – even if she were to clear away the new snow, there was no way she and her siblings would be able to drive _anywhere_ with the condition the van was in now.

She sighed – then, with a heavy heart, she got to work on digging the van back out of the snow…

(…)

Time passed, and Lana continued to work diligently on the van as twilight fell, with dark soon to follow. Lana stepped back and looked at her handiwork in dismay. Although she had cleared all the ice blockage on the van, there was nothing she could do about the punctured tires. Even if there was, she wondered if the van would be able to travel efficiently on the snow-choked roads – and that was assuming Flip had been generous enough to leave a path for them, which she doubted. Lana let herself fall back onto her butt, sitting on the ground and supporting her head with her hands. She despaired about their chances of leaving this place on their own, but was determined not to let Flip win.

Considering the circumstances, there was only one course of action left. Lana crawled back through the tunnel she dug to get back into the Burpin’ Burger building, where all her siblings were taking shelter, to tell them of her plan.

The Burpin’ Burger was dark inside, and getting darker. Lana’s siblings sat huddled in their booth, resting to conserve their energy and warmth. If it weren’t for how miserable they looked otherwise, the scene might have been heartwarming. Lana looked at them in dismay, but hardened her heart as she recalled Flip’s jeering taunts and his sabotage of Vanzilla, and she hopped out of the tunnel and walked up to them.

The other Louds stirred as they heard Lana approach. Lori, hugging Lily close to her chest, rubbed her eyes. _“Mmm…_ Lana?” she said. “Is the van fixed?”

Lana shook her head. “…No. I unblocked the engine, but now the tires are all deflated!”

That caught the siblings’ attention, rousing them from their rest. _“What?_ How did _that_ happen?!” Lori asked, as did many of the others.

Lana shook her head, scowling. “Flip was back here earlier. He still wanted the wrapper, and I said ‘no’ again. I can’t prove that he slashed the tires, but I’m sure he did! I’m _sure_ of it!”

The others gasped, shocked. _“What?!”_ Lola shouted. “Is he trying to get us _killed?”_

“Maybe he _is,”_ Lucy said. “I’ve read lots of stories – you’d be _amazed_ what greed can make people do…”

“How are we going to get home _now…?”_ Leni asked despairingly.

Luna curled up tighter into her ball, shivering. _“C-C-Cold…”_ she whispered. _“S-So cold…”_

Luan, sitting next to Luna, reached her arm around her elder sister. Normally, she would make a joke at her expense, but she could see just how much Luna was suffering. “Oh, poor Luna…” She shot an angry glare at Lana. “Oh, why didn’t you just give Flip the stinking wrapper?”

“No _way.”_ Lana dug out the winning wrapper and cradled it. “Flip thinks he can sell this wrapper for a fortune – but it means more to me than money. It’s a chance for me to meet Bobbie Fletcher – my _hero._ Flip just doesn’t understand that.” She put it back in her pocket, a determined expression on her face. “I’m not gonna let him win. I’m _not.”_

“Well, then what are we gonna _do?”_ asked Lincoln. “We’ve got no ride, no Vanzilla, and no _heating!_ It’s _freezing_ in here!”

_“Cold…”_ Luna whispered. _“I’m so cold…”_

“We _know _you are, Luna,” Lynn snapped. “We _all_ are!”

“Don’t worry, guys,” Lana said. “I swore I would get us out of this, and I _will!”_ She pointed at the door. “I’m gonna leave, and I’m gonna come back with help!”

“In _these_ conditions?!” Lisa exclaimed. “You could lose a digit to frostbite!”

Lana held her fist up. “I’ve got no choice…!”

Lori sighed, handed Lily over to Lincoln, and stood up. “You guys,” she said, _“I’ll_ go. It’s too dangerous for –”

Lana shook her head. “No, Lori, let _me._ I’ve got more resistance to the cold – I mean, I’ve been working out there for hours, and I feel fine!”

Lori eyed her little sister skeptically, but conceded that she had a point. “…Are you _sure_ you know your way back to town?” she asked.

“Of course!” Lana lied. “Don’t worry, you guys! I’ll be there and back before you know it!”

“And what if you’re _not?”_ Lucy asked. “What are we supposed to do?”

“Just…” Lana motioned the others closer together. “Just… _sit tight,_ and conserve body heat! A-And if you get hungry, we still have those leftover burgers from when we got the winning wrapper!”

“But those are _cold_ now, and probably _hard!”_ Lynn started licking her lips and slavering. “I want something warm… juicy…_ meaty…”_

“Beggars can’t be choosers, Lynn!” Lana shook her head stubbornly. “Look, you guys will be fine. _Trust me.”_

The other Loud siblings exchanged uneasy looks. For a while after that, no-one wanted to speak up. Finally, Lori shook her head and placed a hand on Lana’s shoulder.

“Lana…” she said, “…are you _sure_ you can do this?”

Lana nodded. “I am.”

Lori didn’t look convinced, but she still hugged Lana good-bye. “Just…_ hurry back,_ okay?” she said. “And be careful.”

Lana hugged her back. “I will.”

The others bade Lana farewell and implored her to be careful as well. Lana waved off their concerns as she turned and walked back up to the entrance.

“I’ll be right back, guys!” she said. “And I’ll bring help! _I promise!”_

(…)

The wind and the snow whipped at Lana’s face as she slogged through the waist-high snow. Everything was a blur. That bend… that bend looked familiar, but… could she be sure about that? That’s what she thought about the turn five – or was it ten? _Fifteen?_ – minutes ago, and now she was fairly sure that she was in a place that she hadn’t been before. It was always the details, the little details that told her whether she was in a different place or not. But in the dark, and with the snow picking back up, making out those little details was…

Lana stopped, looking around in a panic. She _had_ been here before – hadn’t she? And even if she had, was this the way back to town? Lori or Mr. Loud had always been the one to drive her and her family places, so she’d never had to learn directions, nor did she deem it necessary to pay attention to wherever they were going – to a six-year-old’s mind, the only place between one location and another was the car.

“N… No…” Lana whispered. _“No!_ I _can’t _be…! _I CAN’T be lost!”_

She looked around some more, but the landmarks all around her were of no help at all. She shut her eyes and tried to think, but it was so hard. The _cold…_ the cold had been bad enough when it was leeching into her skin, her bones… her _brain…_ but now, strangely, she was burning up. She still knew how cold it was, at least, but the heat was so unbearable, she could barely resist the urge to strip as fast as her clumsy hands would allow her. She felt so confused, so _sluggish._ In her determination to fix the van and get back home, she’d neglected how much time she was spending outside in the freezing temperatures. Now, she couldn’t feel her fingertips touching the heels of her palms as she made fists. She couldn’t feel her toes wiggling in her boots – if they were wiggling at all. Maybe she wasn’t making fists, or wiggling her toes – maybe she only _thought_ she was, and _that’s_ why she couldn’t feel them.

And that was another thing – more than anything, she just couldn’t think straight. Her brain couldn’t focus on anything other than wanting to sit down, close her eyes, and _sleep._

Lana shook her head, trying to banish the drowsiness from her brain. She couldn’t give up – not _now._ Not while her siblings were counting on her. With a second wind filled with determination, she continued her desperate march through the snow.

But all the determination in the world couldn’t have pointed her in the right direction. Within minutes, she was lost again, soon coming back to the place that she could’ve sworn she’d just left. Panting from the exertion of trudging through several inches of snow, Lana made her way up to a lamppost and started pounding her fists against it in an impotent display of rage, cursing the weather, for being so brutal and unforgiving; Flip, for being so greedy and underhanded, forcing her to resort to such a desperate measure as this; and most of all herself, for being so weak, and useless, and unable to come through for her siblings when they needed her so badly…

Lana pivoted and slumped against the lamppost, sinking to the ground. This was it – this was as far as she could go for now. Her legs felt like lead, the rest of her felt nothing at all, and she was nodding off. There wasn’t much more she could do like _this._

Lana’s eyelids fluttered, and she leaned her head back against the lamppost, legs laid out uselessly in front of her. _Just a little…_ she thought. _Just… gonna close my eyes… for a little while… and then it’s back… b-back…_

As Lana’s vision faded, she heard the all-too familiar crunching of snow, and the sound of someone calling out to her, growing fainter…_ fainter…_

(…)

Lana awoke with a jolt. That had been a strange dream last night – lost in an endless, pitch-black forest, with someone, or some_thing,_ calling her name, tearing at her… well, not _clothes…_ something deeper? Regardless, it certainly wasn’t a _pleasant_ dream, and she was happy to be back in the waking world again.

But her new surroundings were unfamiliar. As her mind cleared, she slowly realized that she was lying on a bed in a jail cell. She pushed herself upright, looking around in a panic, but saw that the door was open and relaxed. Whoever brought her here didn’t intend for her to _stay_ there.

Lana stretched her stiff muscles and hopped off the bed, rubbing her eyes and yawning. She walked out of her cell, her skin feeling taut and inflexible, and headed down the hallway in front of her. As she approached the main room, she heard chatting and laughing, with one voice sounding somewhat familiar. She followed the sounds to their source to find none other than Bobbie Fletcher sitting next to a desk with a young detective with slicked-back black hair, an angular, clean-shaven face, and a camel brown trench coat over a white dress shirt and black tie.

Lana stopped dead in her tracks, and her jaw hit the floor. “B… B-B-B…” Lana stammered. “B-Bo… B-B-Bob…”

Bobbie Fletcher and the detective turned to look at her as soon as they heard her. “Well, look who’s up!” Bobbie said with a smile on her face.

“Bob… Bobbie…!” Lana’s face lit up with elation. “Bobbie… _Fletcher…!”_

Bobbie Fletcher stood up, offering Lana a hug. “Always great to meet a fan!”

Squealing with delight, Lana rushed up and embraced her racecar hero, hopping up and down. Bobbie Fletcher returned the hug warmly, patting Lana on the back and petting her head.

The young detective watched the scene with a fond smile. “Good to see you’re back on your feet and none the worse for wear, sweetie…” he said.

_“O-Ohmygosh!”_ Lana said. _“Ican’tbelieveitIjustcan’tbelieveitBOBBIEFLETCHERintheflesh! OhmygoshohmygoshohmygoshMs.FletcherI’msuchahugefanIneverthoughtI’devermeetyouwellIdidbecauseIwonyour –”_

“Whoa, whoa,_ whoa!”_ Bobbie Fletcher said, prying Lana’s arms away from her waist. “I know it’s a bit hypocritical of me to say, but _slow down there,_ tiger…”

_“Heh._ Yeah…” The detective gestured to the three drinks in paper cups on the desk in front of him. “Why don’t you grab a seat, have yourself some hot cocoa, and settle down some, hm? I’m sure Bobbie here will be _more_ than happy to answer any questions you might have, as will I…”

As Lana took a deep breath, reminding herself that this was really happening and that she couldn’t blow this moment, Bobbie Fletcher shot the detective an arched eyebrow and a mischievous smirk. “Who gave you permission to call me _‘Bobbie’,_ Patty?”

_“You_ did… Bobbie,” Patty replied.

“Oh, _really?_ When?”

“Same time you started calling me ‘Patty’…”

Bobbie Fletcher chuckled as Lana pulled up a chair and grabbed the cup closest to her, lifting it to her mouth. Patty reached out to stop her. “No, wait! That’s not the hot cocoa, that’s –”

But it was too late – the searing, bitter liquid flowed into Lana’s mouth, and as soon as it touched her tongue, her eyes shot open and she spat it out, spraying it all over Patty’s shirt, to the young man’s dismay and Bobbie’s amusement.

“…coffee. That’s… mine.” He grabbed another cup and handed it to Lana. _“This_ is yours.”

Lana coughed, trying to get the taste off her tongue. _“Pwah! Ptooey! Eugh!_ Ah…! Ah… uh…” She rubbed the back of her head as she handed the cup of coffee to the detective, smiling nervously. _“Heh, heh…_ sorry, officer…”

“It’s alright, sweetie. Honest mistake.” Patty grabbed a bunch of tissues and started wiping off his shirt as Lana took a sip of hot cocoa, smiling as the sweetness tickled her tongue and the warmth spread out through her body from her belly.

Bobbie Fletcher took the last cup of coffee and sipped it, smacking her tongue from the heat. “So, sport…” she said, “I’m sure you have questions…”

“Tons!” Lana said. “What are you doing here, Ms. Fletcher? Actually, for that matter, what am _I_ doing here…?”

Bobbie Fletcher chuckled again. “Well, one of those has to do with the other, actually…” After another sip of coffee, she clarified. “You see, I was just on my way back to my hotel when the engine in ol’ Number 88 died out.”

“What happened?”

“Ah, that baby can hit 210 in the straightaway, but throw a little snow at her and she conks out. Anyways, I figure I’m stranded, right? I try calling roadside assistance, but there’s no cell reception. So, I sit and wait in 88, waiting for someone to come by and lend ol’ Bobbie a hand. I waited, and waited, and waited…” She blew a raspberry. “No dice. The snow was _that_ thick. By now it was dark, cold, and starting to snow again. _So…_ I figure if help won’t come to _me,_ then _I’ll_ just have to go find help_ myself._ I started heading in the direction I figured downtown was, and along the way, I just _happen_ to stumble across a cold, tired, lost little girl passed out under a lamppost…” She leaned in close to Lana as she said that.

Lana averted her gaze, staring down into her hot cocoa bashfully. “Oh, yeah…” she said, “…I remember that…”

“I’ll say this, sport – it was a good thing I found you when I did.” Bobbie Fletcher looked at the detective. “And it’s a good thing Patt – uh,_ Detective Flanagan_ here found _us_ when _he_ did. Otherwise…” She shuddered at the thought.

“Oh, nothing to it, miss,” Detective Flanagan said. “I was just out and about, making my rounds, when I came across the two of you struggling along…” He nodded at the two girls. “Just doing my job as an officer of the peace, helping those in need…”

“You did a little more than _help,_ Detective,” Bobbie Fletcher said. “Where’d you learn to treat _frostbite?”_

“University. Majored in Biology.”

Bobbie Fletcher nodded. “Hm.” She turned back to Lana. “Well, like I said, it’s a good thing he found us when he did.”

“Speaking of…” Detective Flanagan leaned forward in his chair. “We know what Ms. Fletcher was doing out there, exposed to the elements – question is, what were_ you_ doing out there, little miss?”

“Me? O-_Oh!_ Oh my gosh, how could I have forgotten?!” Lana hopped to her feet, putting the hot cocoa on the desk and pacing back and forth excitedly. “My family! They’re still there! Oh my gosh! I-I’ve wasted too much time, I-I’ve gotta –”

“Hey, hey, hey, easy, _easy! _Easy, kiddo…” Detective Flanagan said. “Take it easy. Just take a deep breath, and start from the beginning, okay?”

“But –”

_“Please.”_

The way he said it made it clear to Lana that it wasn’t really a request. She looked to Bobbie Fletcher for support, but she wanted to hear this, too. Hanging her head, Lana sighed and started telling her story. “A-All right, so, um… M-My brother and sisters and I went to the Burpin’ Burger, and…”

“Burpin’ Burger?” Bobbie Fletcher said. “Were you there for the contest?”

“Y-Yeah, we were! _Oh,_ t-that reminds me…!” Lana reached into her pocket and pulled out the winning wrapper to show to Bobbie Fletcher.

_“Wow!”_ Bobbie Fletcher said. “Look at you, sport! Guess I’ll be seeing you on my pit crew in about… oh, twelve years, huh?”

_“Yeah!”_ Lana clutched the wrapper tightly, but her heart sank as she looked at it, remembering her siblings. “But… But, see, the snow was falling so fast, so everyone left, but we stayed and kept looking, and by the time we found it, we… we were snowed in.”

“Oh, no!”

“How did you get out?” Detective Flanagan asked.

“W-Well… Well, first of all, Flip was there, and he had a plow, and he said he’d take us home, but he wanted the wrapper for it. He didn’t even want to be on Ms. Fletcher’s pit crew – he just wanted to sell it!”

Detective Flanagan leaned back in his chair, frowning. “Ah, _Flip._ What a surprise.”

“You know this guy?” Bobbie Fletcher asked.

“Oh, yeah, he owns a local gas station – big troublemaker around these parts. Can’t remember the last time his place had a health inspection. The only reason he hasn’t gone out of business yet is because he runs a bunch of other businesses on the side – not all of them legal. We _know_ he’s running them – we just haven’t able to bust him for any of them yet.” Detective Flanagan shook his head. “He’s a slippery old coot, mark my words…”

“Hmm…”

“Anyways, he took the Burpin’ Burger employee home in exchange for some curly fires, but for _us,_ he wanted the wrapper, and I said no. So, what does he do? He leaves us there – _and_ he backs his plow into the building so a bunch of new snow falls down and blocks the entrance again!”

“Ah, classic Flip,” Detective Flanagan said. “Knowing him, he’ll probably try to pass it off as an accident…” He cleared his throat. “So, how did you get out_ then?”_

“I dug a tunnel with some French fry scoopers, and I dug out Vanzilla all by myself!”

_“‘Vanzilla’?”_ Bobbie Fletcher said.

“That’s the family van. It’s an old hunk of junk – and I mean _really_ old.” Lana polished her bicep. “I’m pretty much the only thing keeping that old girl running…”

Bobbie Fletcher raised her eyebrows. “Is that so? Say… what’s your name, kid?”

Lana perked up. “I-It’s _Lana!_ Lana Loud!”

“Well, Lana Loud, if your mechanic skills hold up for another twelve years or so, we might have to upgrade your _honorary_ pit crew position to an _official_ one…”

_“Really?”_ Lana blinked. “Wait – what’s the difference?”

Bobbie Fletcher stifled a snort, and Detective Flanagan chuckled quietly. “Oh, not much, sweetie…” Bobbie Fletcher said. “Anyways, what happened next?”

“Well, we tried to start up Vanzilla, but the engine was all iced up. I tried to melt it with a burger warming lamp, but it just shorted out the whole restaurant.” Lana scowled. “And then _Flip_ came back…”

“What did he want?” Detective Flanagan asked. “The same thing?”

“Yeah – and after I said ‘no’ again, you wanna know what he did? He _slashed the tires on Vanzilla!”_

Bobbie Fletcher bolted upright. _“What?!”_

Lana shook her head, tears in her eyes. “I-I can’t _prove_ that he did it, but he _did!_ I’m _sure_ of it!”

Detective Flanagan held a hand up, nodding. “Don’t worry, Lana, I believe you.”

“So, let me guess…” Bobbie Fletcher leaned forward, tenting her fingers. “You figured that your only hope was to head into town on foot, and get help that _wasn’t _from Flip, correct?”

Lana nodded. “Uh-huh!”

“So, you started walking back to town, but you got turned around and lost, didn’t you?”

“Yeah!”

“Yep. Thought so.” Bobbie Fletcher leaned back. “Ignoring how easily a six-year-old can get lost in a _supermarket,_ let alone along dark, snow-covered streets, the cold must’ve been messing with your brain.”

“R-Really?”

“Mm-hmm. That’s what hypothermia does – it _confuses_ you. _Disorients_ you. And… it makes you sleepy.” She looked straight at Lana. “So, you decided to just catch a little sleep under a lamppost, didn’t you?”

“Y-Yeah…”

“Well, that would’ve been a sleep that you _never_ would’ve woken up from, if I hadn’t been there.” Bobbie Fletcher smiled, patting Lana’s knee. “It’s okay, kid, no need to thank me,” she said sincerely. “You’re welcome.”

Detective Flanagan gave Bobbie an impressed look, uttering a whistle. “Not bad, Jessica Fletcher,” he said.

“That’s _Bobbie_ Fletcher, pal.”

“I know what I said.” He leaned over his desk. “So… your siblings are still there, for all we know?” he asked Lana. “Cold? Hungry? Frostbitten… or _worse?”_

Lana sank into her seat as the gravity of her family’s situation slammed into her. There they were, suffering on _her_ behalf – because of something that _she _wanted! It was up to her to get them out of the mess she’d gotten them into – and she _failed._ Heck, if it weren’t for Bobbie Fletcher and Detective Flanagan finding her by lucky fluke, no-one might even know they’re there, huddling in a cold, empty Burpin’ Burger, slowly freezing to death…

A sob escaped Lana’s chest, then another, then another. “Y-Yes…” She shuddered and gasped, tears starting to well up in the corners of her eyes. _“Yes… It’s all my fault…”_

Detective Flanagan shook his head. “No, Lana. I’ve got a pretty good idea of whose fault _this_ is…” Clucking his tongue, he picked up the phone and punched in a number. “Oh, Flip, you’ve _really_ done it now…” he muttered.

After a few moments, Flip presumably picked up the phone. _“Lipman,”_ Detective Flanagan said sternly. “…Take a wild guess, _genius…!_ That’s right! Get your fat rear end down to the station _on the double!”_ He winked at Lana, who had stopped sobbing. “I said_ now…! NO EXCUSES! JUST GET DOWN HERE!”_

Detective Flanagan slammed the phone back down onto the receiver, to the astonishment of Lana and Bobbie Fletcher. After a moment of silence, Bobbie Fletcher’s mouth spread into a grin. _“Dang,_ Patty! Never knew you could be so _aggressive…”_

Detective Flanagan shrugged. “Eh, I was just laying down the law – that’s my _job.”_ He scowled. “Besides, any creep who’d make a sweet, innocent six-year-old girl walk across the dark streets in freezing temperatures doesn’t deserve any sympathy.”

“Hey, I’m not complaining.” Bobbie Fletcher sighed. “I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again – it’s a miracle you were there when you were, Detective. You saved us.” She looked at Lana. “You… You saved _her.”_

Lana nodded at Detective Flanagan. “Thank you, Detective Flanagan…”

Detective Flanagan smiled at her. “My pleasure, sweetie.” He looked at Bobbie Fletcher. “And it was most certainly a pleasure to have met you, Bobbie…”

“Oh, _no,_ Detective,” Bobbie Fletcher said. “The pleasure was all _mine.”_

Lana looked between the two adults, confused. “Um… what’s going on?”

“Oh, you know, Lana, the detective and I had a little chat last night, after we made sure that you’d be alright, and another one earlier this morning,” Bobbie Fletcher said. “Turns out we’ve got a _lot_ in common. We’ve got the same taste in movies and TV…”

“Murder mysteries,” Detective Flanagan said.

“Crime thrillers,” Bobbie Fletcher added.

_“Police procedurals!”_ they said together, then laughed.

“Oh…” Lana said.

“We’ve also got the same taste in music,” Bobbie Fletcher continued. “Classic rock…”

“Mick Swagger in particular,” Detective Flanagan added.

Lana’s face brightened. _“Hey!_ My sister Luna loves Mick Swagger, too!”

“Well, your sister’s got _great _taste, then!” Bobbie Fletcher said.

_“And_ we’ve got the same taste in _coffee!”_ Detective Flanagan chimed in.

Bobbie Fletcher took a deep whiff of the coffee remaining in her cup. “Black as night, and hot as he –”

_“Whoa!”_ Detective Flanagan chuckled awkwardly. “Not in front of the kid, huh?”

Lana folded her arms and pouted. “I know what she was gonna say…”

Detective Flanagan looked surprised, then laughed. “Precocious, aren’t you?”

Lana blushed. “No – _you_ are!”

Bobbie Fletcher and Detective Flanagan both burst out laughing. “Do you know what that word means, sweetie?” Detective Flanagan asked.

“Of _course_ I know what it means!” Lana said. “D… Do _you_ know what it means?”

Once again, the two adults laughed. “Yes, Lana, we know. Trust me, it’s nothing insulting.” Bobbie Fletcher patted Lana on the head. “We both love kids, too…”

Lana beamed. “Y-You _do?”_

“Sure do!” Detective Flanagan agreed. “Little angels…”

Lana pouted and folded her arms again. “Not _me!_ I’m no angel…”

Bobbie Fletcher grinned, pinching Lana’s cheek. “Nah, you’re just a little _grease monkey,_ aren’tcha? Like to get dirty…?”

Lana chuckled. “Yeah! The dirtier, the _grosser, _the _better!”_

“That’s you, Lana – _never_ being afraid to be different!” Detective Flanagan said.

“And we _love you_ for it!” Bobbie Fletcher looked back at the detective. “And… we both struggle under the weight of our family legacies, too…”

That caught Lana off-guard. “H-Huh?”

Detective Flanagan snorted, though it was humorless. “Yeah… See, I wanted to be a teacher, but my father nixed that – as soon as I got my undergraduate degree, it was off to police academy for me.” Detective Flanagan shrugged. “That’s just how it is – every generation, a Flanagan on the force. Ever since Seamus Flanagan hopped off the boat at Ellis Island and started wearing the blue, followed by his son Patrick, _his_ son Patrick, Jr., all the way down to _me_ – Patrick Flanagan the Fifth.”

“Yeah, I’ve been meaning to say…” Bobbie Fletcher sized Detective Flanagan up. “Your legacy’s… a bit too _big _for a town like Royal Woods, you know what I’m saying?”

“Careful, Ms. Fletcher – Royal Woods is my home.” He sighed. “…Wasn’t _always_ that way, though. I’m originally from Detroit.”

Bobbie Fletcher snapped her fingers. “I knew it!”

“Got promoted from the beat to detective almost right away, thanks to my dad, the chief. Now, I’d been _raised_ for the job – ever since I was ten, I was in coroners’ offices, watching dead bodies get pulled apart. But still, two other, senior detectives didn’t like my promotion, said I was riding on my dad’s coattails. So, they pulled some strings with the higher-ups, and got me transferred to Royal Woods.”

“What?” Bobbie Fletcher waved dismissively. “Those _jerks…”_

“Yeah, well, no-one _else_ ever doubted my worthiness of the position – especially since I uncovered evidence of those two taking bribes and kickbacks for Internal Affairs to look at!”

Bobbie Fletcher let out a hoot. “Oh, _nice!”_

“After that, my dad offered to transfer me back to Detroit, but I turned him down.”

“Huh? Why?”

Detective Flanagan smiled. “I like it here. It’s quiet; peaceful. The worst crime we’ve ever had in this jurisdiction happened decades ago, and recently, the worst we’ve had was a string of burglaries some time ago and some woman going on a crime spree – which happened to consist of parking violations, public loitering, and smashing old radios in public.”

Bobbie Fletcher looked puzzled. “Huh? That’s a _crime?”_

“Apparently. And the thing is, she was just doing it to get slapped with public service – all to get away from her chaotic family! Can you believe _that?”_

Detective Flanagan and Bobbie Fletcher shared a laugh. Lana awkwardly joined in, not deeming it necessary to inform them that the women in question was her mother.

_“Ah…_ Anyways, what about _you,_ Ms. Fletcher? _I_ come from a police dynasty, and _you_ come from a racing dynasty…”

“That’s right…! _That’s right!”_ Lana exclaimed. “Bobbie Fletcher’s the third racecar driver of the Fletcher family; following after Daryl Fletcher, Jr., her father, and Daryl Fletcher, Sr. her grandfather!”

Bobbie Fletcher nodded. “You know your NASCAR, Lana Loud. Well done!”

“But is that what you _really_ wanted to be, Bobbie?” Detective Flanagan asked.

“Actually…” Bobbie Fletcher gave the detective a coy grin. “…I wanted to be a _police officer.”_

Detective Flanagan guffawed loudly. _“Y-You’re kidding!”_

_“I am not!”_ Bobbie Fletcher said, laughing along with him.

Detective Flanagan wiped a tear out of his eye. _“Ah…_ Boy, let me tell you – you dodged a bullet on _that_ one!” He sighed, shaking his head. “I tell you, Bobbie, this job ain’t all it’s cracked up to be. Most of it’s boring, and the rest is _dangerous.”_

“Who said I was afraid of a little danger?”

“Oh, trust me – _your_ definition of ‘danger’ and _my_ definition of ‘danger’ are two totally different levels of danger…”

Bobbie Fletcher shrugged. “Eh, can’t argue with that…” She smiled, leaning forward. “You’re a real _sensible_ guy, you know that, Detective? A _smart_ guy…”

Detective Flanagan smiled back. “Am I?”

“Mm-hmm. You know, in NASCAR, I’ve seen a lot of _pushy, boorish alphas_ trying to make passes at me.” Her gaze skirted the detective’s chest and worked its way back up. “I could use a little… _stability _in my life…”

Detective Flanagan raised an eyebrow at her. “That so? Well, I doubt anyone could stop you from getting it. That’s just who you are, _what_ you are – a real go-getter girl…”

Bobbie Fletcher shrugged, biting her lip. “Hey, you can’t be a racecar champion by not knowing what you want… and _taking it…”_

Bobbie Fletcher and Detective Flanagan held each other’s gazes after that for a while. There was… _something…_ in the air – Lana could feel it, but she didn’t quite know what it was…

Whatever that thing was, it was interrupted by Flip flinging the doors to the police station open. Once he was cleared by the receptionist, he made his way through the maze of desks to the three at Detective Flanagan’s desk. The detective stood up to meet him.

The look Flip gave the young detective could not be described as “friendly” by any stretch. _“Flanagan.”_

Detective Flanagan returned the shopkeeper’s sentiments. _“Flip.”_

Flip folded his arms. “What’s this about_ now,_ chief?”

Detective Flanagan put his hands behind his back and stared Flip down. “I was just in the neighborhood last night, doing my rounds, when I came across _this_ young woman…” He gestured to Bobbie Fletcher. “…and _this_ little girl.”

Flip followed Detective Flanagan’s gesture to Lana, and his eyes went wide. Lana, in response, channeled her twin sister and gave a little smirk that said, _You’re in trouble now…_

Flip turned his gaze back to Detective Flanagan, and his face lit up with indignation. “…I didn’t do _nothin’!”_ he said. “You’ve got _nothin’_ on me!”

“That remains to be seen, Flip.” Detective Flanagan started pacing back and forth. “Now, it has come to my attention that you’ve been charging people money to dig their cars out of the snow with your plow. Is that right?”

“So what? It ain’t _illegal!”_

“I never said it _was,_ Flip. But that’s not my point. My _point_ is that, on one occasion, you attempted to barter your services for one contest-winning wrapper from the Burpin’ Burger.” He reached his hand out to Lana, and Lana handed him the wrapper, which he showed to Flip. _“This_ wrapper. Is that right?”

“No! I ain’t never seen that wrapper before!”

Detective Flanagan reached his arm around Lana, patting her shoulder. “Lana here begs to differ – as will her siblings, as well as any _other_ Burpin’ Burger patrons we can track down through credit card transactions that day, as I’m sure that any of them will be more than willing to tell us how you _were_ there that day, and were very much trying to win the wrapper. Isn’t that right, Lana?”

Lana nodded. “Yup!” She started doing her best impression of Flip. _“‘Oh, yeah, Bippity Fletchman. Huge fan!’”_

“I never –”

_“‘Don’t care! Just gonna sell the winnin’ wrapper to some sucker for big bucks!’”_ Her impression finished Lana stood arms akimbo, giving Flip a smug look.

Flip was starting to turn red. _“So what?_ Don’t tell me you wouldn’t do the same, chief!”

“We’re not talking about _me,_ Flip; we’re talking about_ you._ And _that_ definitely sounds like something you’d do.” Detective Flanagan took one step towards Flip. “In fact, you wanted this wrapper _so_ bad, that you withheld your vital services to Lana and her family unless they handed it over, because there was _no_ way you could legally obtain it otherwise. _Isn’t that right?”_

“That’s _bull-hockey!_ Heck, fer all _I_ know, that wrapper ain’t even the genuine article, so it weren’t even legal ta’ begin with!”

Detective Flanagan turned his head back slightly towards Bobbie Fletcher. “Miss Fletcher, were there any other wrappers like this one in the contest?” he asked.

Bobbie Fletcher shook her head. “Nope – that’s the one and only. The only other one like it was for demonstration purposes…” She reached into one of her pockets and pulled out the demonstrative wrapper. “…and I have it right here.”

Smiling, Detective Flanagan turned back to Flip. “Well… I think Miss Fletcher’s testimony is beyond doubt.” He held out the wrapper. _“This_ is the winning wrapper, Flip. And when you didn’t get it, you not only denied the Louds a ride home, but blocked the way out by backing your plow into the building, dropping even _more_ snow onto the exit, preventing them from leaving. _Isn’t. That. Right?”_

“It was an _accident!”_ Flip pointed at Lana. “‘Sides, _she_ still got out!”

“So, you admit that there _was_ a collapse of snow blocking the exit, accidental or no! And yet, you did _nothing_ to rectify your _‘mistake’,_ leaving Lana here to dig her way out on her own!” Detective Flanagan shrugged. “And why _would_ you? After all, letting them leave with the wrapper you want so badly would have been, ah… _counterproductive_ to your aims, wouldn’t it?”

Flip blanched. He’d fallen right into Detective Flanagan’s trap. “Ah… B… Y… Sh… I…” he sputtered, searching for an adequate excuse. Seeing Lana’s smug expression caused him to latch onto the straw she dangled in front of him._ “Come on! _You’re gonna believe a _little girl _over _me?!”_

“I’d believe _Donald Trump _over_ you,_ Flip – and he’s a whole other _level_ of _‘politician’,_ if you catch my drift!” Detective Flanagan took another step closer. “And let’s not forget: she’s not the _only_ witness we’ve got! We have the Burpin’ Burger customers, who saw you there that day and understand your motives; the Burpin’ Burger employee, who knows for a fact that your rescues aren’t free, _and_ was rescued by you while the Louds were not; and oh – _how_ many siblings, Lana?”

“Ten,” Lana answered.

_“Ten!_ My _goodness, _your parents haven’t been wasting any time!” He turned back to Flip. “That’s _ten_ siblings, Flip – and that means _ten_ witnesses to your actions!” He mimed doing calculations. “So, when you take all the facts of the matter into account, and add them all together…” He got right up in Flip’s face.

“…you’re looking at _multiple_ counts of criminal negligence, child endangerment, _and_ false imprisonment. It’s, ah, oh… _five years_ minimum on just _one_ of those counts. If we can nail you with all _three?”_ Detective Flanagan uttered a low whistle. “Say goodbye to the outside world…”

Flip was wraithlike. All the color had drained from his face. He was trapped, and he knew it. Detective Flanagan had been after him for years – he couldn’t expect any mercy from him. But _her…_ or _her…_

He appealed to Bobbie Fletcher first. “H-_Hey! _Bippity – _uh!_ B-B-_Bobbie!_ Bobbie Fletchman! Y-You’ve gotta understand, chief, I…! I-I-I jus’ wanted ta’ be on yer pit crew _so bad!”_

“Bad enough to let a little girl die of hypothermia?” Bobbie Fletcher tossed her head. “You don’t _deserve_ to call yourself a fan of mine!”

No help from her – Flip’s only hope now was Lana Loud, the girl he’d mistreated so much lately. “H-Hey… Hey, kid, uh…! Uh, h-hey, hey, listen – _listen_ to ol’ Flip, willya! I-I didn’t mean nothin’ by it, I _swear!_ All I wanted was ta’ make some moolah, that’s all! I didn’t mean fer no-one ta’ get _hurt!”_

Lana just deadpanned at him, unmoved.

Desperate, Flip threw himself on the ground. _“Please,_ kid! _Please, I’m beggin’ ya!_ Don’ let ‘em take ol’ Flip back ta’ the slammer! _I don’ think I’ll SURVIVE!”_ Suddenly, he lifted his head up, having gotten an idea. “I know! Tell ya what, how ‘bout _this?_ You keep the wrapper, an’ I’ll throw in free Flippees fer a week!”

Lana just kept on staring at him.

“Okay, okay! Free Flippees fer a _month!_ _Two months! THREE! Snacks! Snacks too! All the snacks and the Flippees you want, for three months! A-A YEAR! FOR **LIFE! **NEVER PAY FOR SNACKS OR FLIPPEES AGAIN! It’s yours, it’s ALL yours…!”_ Flip raised his head up off the floor to spare one last glance at Lana’s unmerciful face. Sobbing like a little baby, he curled up into a ball on the floor. “Please, kid… _Please…_ Don’ let ‘em…! _Don’ let ‘em take me back…”_

As Flip wept helplessly at Detective Flanagan’s feet, he turned to look at Lana. Lana looked at Flip, completely subjugated. He was _pathetic_. Seeing the smug, sneaky shyster reduced to a begging, babbling baby brought a sick sense of joy to her heart, and in that moment, she shared a shining moment of empathy with her twin, Lola. She looked up at Detective Flanagan and motioned, _Get on with it, then._

Detective Flanagan nodded, and gave Flip an encouraging light kick. “C’mon, Flip, _get up,” _he said. “You’re making a mess.” Once Flip had dragged himself back to his feet, cringing and fearful, Detective Flanagan jabbed his pointer finger at his chest. “Just _take that girl to the Burpin’ Burger; pick up her family; _and_ TAKE. THEM. HOME. Got it?”_

Flip nodded quickly. Detective Flanagan leaned in to whisper in his ear. “…And you’d better pray to God that none of them are injured… or _worse._ And if they _are…_ that the Louds are merciful enough not to press charges…”

With that, Flip was left quaking in his boots again. “I… I-I-I –”

Detective Flanagan pointed at the front entrance. “Time’s a-wasting, Flip! There’s the door! Best get moving!”

“I –!”

_“Bye!”_

Like a greasy grey rocket, Flip took off towards the front door, calling in a shrill voice for Lana to hurry and join him. Lana took her time, though – if only to make Flip squirm more – and bade Detective Flanagan goodbye.

“Thanks for all your help, Detective…” Lana told him.

Detective Flanagan kneeled down to Lana’s level and put one hand on her shoulder and another over his heart. “My dear Lana…” he said, “…the pleasure was all _mine.”_

Lana giggled.

As Detective Flanagan stood up, he said, “Would you and your siblings mind swinging by the station tomorrow? I’d like to hear your collective story to corroborate the evidence…”

Lana nodded. “No problem.”

“Thanks. Stay safe!”

As Lana waved goodbye to the kind young detective and started for the front door, she heard a voice behind her saying something she never thought she’d hear:

_“Room for one more?”_

Lana turned around in disbelief. She thought she’d just been cooperating with the police before, but now Bobbie Fletcher, NASCAR racing champion, was offering to travel with her, _her,_ to the Burpin’ Burger! “Y…! Y…! Y-Y-You _mean it?!”_

“Sure!” Bobbie Fletcher said. “I figure some autographs might make the whole experience worth it for you and your siblings! If they actually open, I could also go for a Big Belcher with extra pickles!” She leaned in close. _“And between you and me…”_ she whispered, _“…I want to see Flip cry and whimper some more…!”_

Lana’s grin spread from ear to ear. Whoever said “never meet your heroes” could go _suck an egg –_ Lana’s hero, her _idol,_ had proven herself to be cooler than anything beyond her wildest _dreams!_

Lana’s nodding was so rapid, Bobbie Fletcher had to manually stop it. “Hey, _hey!”_ she said, laughing. “Don’t hurt yourself, sport!” She turned to Detective Flanagan. “See you later, Detective?”

Detective Flanagan shot a finger gun at her. “Bye, girls! Don’t stop being beautiful!”

Bobbie Fletcher blinked, taken aback. _“Ha…!_ Bold, aren’t you…?”

“What can I say? You’ve inspired me to live a little more dangerously…”

Bobbie Fletcher grinned, eyeing him appraisingly. “Stay gold, Ponyboy…”

Lana was too starstruck to notice the sexual tension as Detective Flanagan and Bobbie Fletcher parted ways. “U-Um…” she said, “…c-can I just say… how much of an _honor_ this is, Ms. Fletcher…!”

Bobbie Fletcher smiled down at Lana. “Call me ‘Bobbie’, sweetie…”

(…)

The ride over to the Burpin’ Burger was less eventful than Lana had expected, and over far too quickly. She sat sandwiched between Flip and Bobbie, this time watching the roads – when she wasn’t watching Flip. Having now recovered from his groveling display, Flip steamed behind the wheel of the plow, having been thoroughly humiliated. His scheme to make a quick buck had exploded disastrously in his face, and boy, did it sting.

“…Shoulda jus’ given me the wrapper when ya had the chance…!” he grumbled.

Lana raised her fist threateningly. “Shut up and drive, buttbrain!” she snapped.

Bobbie snickered at Lana’s order and Flip’s whipped muttering, and Lana smiled up at her, happy to have her idol’s approval.

Soon, the trio arrived at the Burpin’ Burger. Vanzilla still sat where it was in the parking lot, a metal deadweight. More than anything, Flip wanted to drive over that rustbucket with his plow and crush it into scrap metal, but he still had enough sense to know that _that_ was a horrible idea – one that would serve as temporary catharsis, then add vandalism to his record.

Reluctantly, he steered around the old van and cleared the blockage in front of the building. As soon as Flip killed the engine, Lana leapt out of her seat.

“Oh, man… Oh, _man…!_ I hope they’re all alright…!” she said.

Bobbie, who sat between Lana and the door, found herself being crawled over by a very anxious six-year-old. _“Ah!_ Hey, Lana, take it easy…! _Hahaha!”_

Lana opened the door and jumped down. _“Guys?”_ she called out. _“It’s me, Lana! I’m back!”_

There was no answer from within. Lana shared a concerned glance with Bobbie, then rushed towards the Burpin’ Burger. Bobbie and Flip hurried forward, too – Bobbie to support Lana, and Flip to make sure he wouldn’t be facing a lawsuit.

Lana burst through the doors of the Burpin’ Burger. _“Guys! I’m back!”_

There was no answer.

The interior of the Burpin’ Burger… was deserted. The thick snow, still piled high against the windows and walls all around the building obfuscated the incoming sunlight, letting only a faint glow through.

Lana’s hope and elation turned to dread in an instant. “Guys?” She walked to the center of the room, looking around. _“Guys?”_

Bobbie and Flip entered behind her. “You said they were here?” Bobbie said.

“Last I checked, yeah,” Flip replied. “Where is everybody?”

“Guys? _Guys?”_ Lana started to look around frantically. “Lola! Lincoln! Luna!_ Where are you guys?!”_

Flip pointed at the kitchen. “M-Maybe they’re in the back?”

Lana seized upon the suggestion without hesitation, bursting through the double doors leading into the kitchen from the main dining area.

“Guy – yyyyy_yyyyyyoooooOOOAAAA!”_

She slipped and skidded on a frozen surface beneath her feet, losing her footing and landing flat on her butt. Flip, never one to let a sucker pratfalling go to waste, laughed at her, while Bobbie rushed through the doors and knelt to help Lana.

“Lana!” she said. “Are you okay?”

Lana grimaced and rubbed her sore tushie. “Fine… just slipped, is all…”

“Slipped on what?”

Both Lana and Bobbie took a look at the floor while Flip finished up laughing and joined them. There was a slick, frozen red spot on the floor – one that was spread out and spattered here and there, this way and that.

As Lana struggled to her feet, Bobbie scraped up a few frozen red crystals, rubbing them between her fingers and finally tasting them. “…Blood,” she concluded. “Lots of it.”

“B-_Blood?”_ Lana said. “W-What’s all this _blood_ doing here…?!”

“Hey, _genius!”_ Flip said. “Burgers are made from _beef;_ beef comes from _cows!_ How d’ya think they get the beef from the cows, huh?”

“This is no _slaughterhouse,_ Flip – this is a _family restaurant!_ Any burger patties brought here are already processed and frozen, _genius!”_ Bobbie said, jabbing Flip in the chest with her finger.

Flip tossed his hands in the air. “Well, excuse _me_ fer makin’ suggestions! Where do _you_ think the blood came from, then?!”

“G… Guys…?”

Bobbie and Flip both turned to Lana. “What is it, Lana?” Bobbie asked.

Lana didn’t answer. She seemed to be frozen in place. Slowly, almost imperceptibly, she raised a shaky finger to point at a spot concealed by the grill.

Shaken by her silence, Bobbie and Flip stopped arguing and approached her warily. “Lana…?” Bobbie said. “What do you see…?”

Lana still didn’t answer, still staring with eyes as wide as dinner plates. Bobbie and Flip both rounded the grill, stood behind Lana, and followed her gaze.

And then they saw the bones.


	2. Merciless As Winter

**Author’s Note: Hey-ho! Now that winter has begun properly, it’s time to return to this story!**

**Remember how I said the story branched out in different paths? Well, one path would’ve had Detective Flanagan going with Lana and Flip to the Burpin’ Burger instead of Bobbie Fletcher. I was almost convinced to go with that route, but I was talked out of it at the last second. I decided to sacrifice a chance to develop a recurring OC of mine in favor of going with an established canon character whose path fits the story beats better – though I tried to squeeze as much of Flanagan’s characterization from the other path into the first chapter as I could. Maybe, if this fic ever gets developed into a visual novel, you could see all the possible storylines yourself!**

**Maybe…**

**There was an additional scene I planned to include in this chapter, but it ended up running _way_ too long, so I think I’ll save it for the beginning of the next one. Stay tuned!**

**I’m Captain Dodge – thank you, and Merry Christmas!**

(…)

There was a pregnant pause, as nobody could find the presence of mind to speak, move, or even breathe. Instead, the trio stared in dead silence as the gravity of what they were looking at slowly sank in.

When it finally hit them, Flip was the first to speak up, letting loose a stream of profanities.

_“Oh, sweet Patanu! Mother of Flagg! Jump-Around-Jump-Jump!”_

Hearing his colorful cursing snapped Bobbie Fletcher to attention. _“Hey!_ Watch your language around –!” With a start, she remembered exactly who was with them, and she turned to the six-year-old girl in front of her. “L-Lana?”

Lana stood frozen, eyes as wide as can be and staring at the bones piled haphazardly in a heap in front of her. When she’d finally come back to her family’s aid, she’d assumed the worst, but _this…_ this was _so_ much worse than “worst”. She could see the knobby end of a femur or a humerus sticking out here, the smashed fragments of a skull there, broken ribs jutting upwards like pikes… all gathered into one neat pile.

There was no denying it – here, on the floor before her, was an actual, genuine, honest-to-God _dead body._

And, most likely… one belonging to one of her siblings.

She started shivering – and not from the cold. “Haah… _Haah…”_

In a flash, Bobbie grabbed Lana, turned her around, and hugged her. “Lana, _don’t look!”_ she cried.

Lana stood on her tiptoes, reached her arms as far around Bobbie’s waist as she could, buried her face in her stomach, shut her eyes tightly, and desperately struggled to form words around the sobs. _“I-I – Th – I d – N – We –!”_

Bobbie started stroking Lana’s head – a gesture that was meant to be calming, but whose roughness betrayed how shaken the racecar driver was. “It’s okay, Lana, it’s okay…”

_“NO!”_ Lana finally screamed into Bobbie’s stomach. She looked up at her hero, tears squeezing out of her eyes and rolling down her cheeks. “Somebody is…! _Somebody is…!”_

She couldn’t bear to finish that sentence – not when she knew whom it applied to. As she planted her face back into Bobbie’s jacket, weeping uncontrollably, Bobbie realized just how poor a choice of words hers were. Here was a little girl, witnessing something no little girl should _ever_ witness, and all she had to say was _“It’s okay”?_

Sighing heavily, Bobbie closed her eyes, held Lana close, and said nothing, not wanting to upset the poor girl any more.

Despite her inaction, Lana spoke back up again on her own. Her first word was muffled by Bobbie’s jacket, but she turned her head to the side and repeated, _“How…_ How did this happen?!”

“I…” Bobbie looked at the pile of bones, considering the possibilities, but nothing came to her. She shook her head, sighing again. “…I don’t know, Lana. I don’t know.”

Flip, meanwhile, was equally distraught – but more out of concern for himself than for Lana, her siblings, or whoever that pile of bones might have belonged to, be they Louds or otherwise. “Aw, _jeez…!”_ he said. “Aw, _criminy…!_ What are we gonna do?!”

Lana looked at him, then craned her neck to snatch another glimpse of the bones. “We…” Only now did it occur to her that they needed to _act_ now, not_ angst._ “We…!” She broke away from Bobbie’s embrace, looking up at her. “W-We’ve gotta call the police!”

“Police…?” Bobbie blinked, then nodded. “Police… _Right!”_ She fished her cellphone out of one pocket, and a small slip of paper out of another. “I-I’ll call Detective Flanagan!”

That surprised Lana. “Detective –? Wait, you have his number?”

Bobbie froze. “Uh…” She blushed, looking askance. “Y-Yeah…”

“W-Well, then what are you waiting for? _Call him!”_

“R-Right!”

The name of a certain police detective slammed into Flip like an 18-wheel semi. He still remembered fully well the rap Detective Flanagan had slapped him with, along with his warning as to what should happen if the Louds were anything but alright when he returned to pick them up. No way would Mr. and Mrs. Loud _ever_ find it in their hearts not to press charges against him after _this –_ assuming that the bones in front of him indeed used to be one of their children, which, in all likelihood, they did.

If Detective Flanagan found out about this… he’d put Flip away for sure.

Perhaps this time… for_ good._

Bobbie finally reached the keypad on her phone app. “Okay… 8… 7… 6 –_ Hey!”_

As she began to input Detective Flanagan’s phone number, Flip snatched her phone out of her hand and rapidly backed away. _“No!”_

“Flip, what do you think you’re doing?!” Bobbie demanded.

“No cops!” he shouted, holding the phone up threateningly._ “No cops!”_

Bobbie gritted her teeth, growling. “Flip, this is _no_ time to be fooling around!” she said in a low voice. She held out her hand. “Give me back the dang phone!”

Flip only backed further away… right next to the deep fryer, which he opened.

_“No!”_ Bobbie and Lana both said.

Too late – Flip brandished the phone and tossed it into the fryer. To everyone’s surprise, however, they heard not a _plop,_ but a dull clattering sound. Bobbie raced up to the deep fryer and looked inside alongside Flip, where the two of them saw Bobbie’s phone resting atop a layer of solidified cooking oil.

Bobbie shot Flip a glare and a smug smirk. _“Hmph –_ it’s frozen, ya moron,” she said, retrieving her phone and pulling up the “Weather” app. “It’s ten degrees below freezing out here…”

She pulled the keypad back up as Flip tried to get a peek at her phone. _“Hey!_ What’re ya doin’?!_ HEY!”_ He pushed Bobbie’s phone hand down and stuck a finger in her face. _“Hey –_ do _not_ call the cops!”

Bobbie scoffed. “Oh, yeah? And_ why not?”_

Flip folded his arms and scowled. “‘Cuz if ya _do…_ you can kiss that ride back to town _good-bye!”_

Behind Bobbie, Lana snorted. “Ride…” She marched up, shoving past Bobbie. _“Ride…! RIDE…!”_ She grabbed Flip by the lapels of his jacket, yanking him down with surprising strength to make him see the fury in her eyes. _“If you’d just given us a ride back to town yesterday, NONE OF THIS WOULD HAVE HAPPENED!”_ She started hitting Flip’s chest. “You… You _dimbus!_ You full-on _poo-head!”_

Flip easily parried Lana’s ineffectual physical blows, but her words hit him harder than her hands ever could. “W-Well…! Well… Well, I _woulda_ given you ‘n yer folks a ride home, if _you’d_ jus’ given me the winnin’ wrapper!”

Lana ceased her assault and glared up at Flip with a quivering lip and a furrowed brow. For a few moments she stood there, not saying a word, until her eyes started to water. Bobbie reached out to put a hand on her shoulder, but before she could, Lana darted out the double doors and out of the kitchen.

“Lana…!” Bobbie called after her, as the sounds of Lana’s footsteps and a door opening and closing echoed through the empty restaurant. Bobbie directed her gaze and her anger towards Flip, hands balled at her sides.

Flip shrugged, defensive. “What? I offered ‘em a ride – I _did!_ But _someone_ had ta get all _greedy_ with their wrapper…!”

Bobbie raised a fist to him and nearly struck him, but restrained herself at the last moment. This was useless – right now, Lana deserved her attention more. She uncurled her pointer finger from her raised fist, wordlessly warning him not to go anywhere, then burst through the double doors after Lana.

“Lana? _Lana?”_

She looked around the dining area – the little girl was nowhere to be seen. Thinking carefully, she remembered the sound of a door being opened, and reasoned that the only place she could have gone, based on that and the layout of the restaurant, was the restroom, and she headed there.

Bobbie entered the girls’ restroom and heard sobs emanating from the stall furthest from the door. She walked up to it and knocked on the stall door. “Lana?”

Lana didn’t answer, only continuing to cry.

Bobbie pushed the door open, seeing Lana sitting on the toilet, red-faced and sniffling. “Come on, Lana, don’t cry…” she said as she picked up the six-year-old, sat down, and seated her on her lap. “Don’t listen to Flip – he’s just a big, fat, greedy _jerk._ Honestly, who does he think he is, trying to pin all of his blame on a little girl like –”

“But he’s _right!”_ Lana shouted, looking up at her.

Bobbie started, taken aback. “W-What?”

“He’s _right! _This…” Lana buried her face in her hands again. “This _is_ all my fault…”

“Don’t say that, Lana!”

“But it _is!_ Don’t you see?!” Lana lowered her hands, but kept her gaze firmly downwards. “I-I _knew…_ I _knew_ how dangerous things were! Lisa kept telling us over and over about the snow, b-but I just…” She sniffled, looking up at Bobbie. “I just wanted to win that contest, and-and be on your pit crew_ so bad…!” _She shook her head. “…I had _plenty_ of opportunities to give Flip that wrapper – to get us back home, _safe._ B-But I was just too _stubborn…_ and_ selfish…!”_ She hung her head. “…That wrapper is only good for one person. I thought _I_ would be that person. S-So, so I dragged my brother and sisters here, a-and made them all stuff themselves, and-and then _denied them a ride home,_ and-and-and _abandoned them here, overnight, in the freezing cold…!”_

Lana pounded her fists in her lap over and over again. “A-And now they’re _gone!_ They’re all _gone!_ They’re gone, and I have _no idea_ where they are! And somebody’s –!” She gulped, choking on the word. “S-Somebody’s… Somebody’s…! Somebody’s… d-dead! Dead!_ Dead! They’re DEAD! And I killed them!”_ She reached into her pocket and grasped the wrapper, crumpling it in her hand. “All for this _stupid, stinking, WORTHLESS WRAPPER!”_

Lana threw the crumpled wrapper at the wall, which it bounced off of and landed on the floor in front of her and Bobbie. She collapsed into an inconsolable heap, and there was nothing Bobbie could do for the poor girl except hold her close, stroke her soothingly, and let her cry herself out.

For a good ten minutes, Lana cried into Bobbie’s chest, staining her jacket with tears and mucus. Finally, she exhausted her supply of sobs, leaving her gasping and hiccupping instead.

“You done?” Bobbie asked. “Got it all out?”

Lana just rested her head wearily against Bobbie’s shoulder. _“…Mm.”_

“Good.” Bobbie took some toilet paper, folded it up neatly, and pressed it against Lana’s runny nose. “Blow.”

Lana blew her nose into the TP as hard as she could muster, and when she was done, Bobbie wiped off her nose and dropped the soiled makeshift tissue in the toilet bowl. “Feel better?” she asked.

Lana closed her red, puffy eyes. “…No.”

Bobbie sighed. “Look, Lana, you never_ meant_ for this to happen. No-one ever _does.”_ She scowled. “Well, _some_ people do…” She shook her head. “B-But the point is, there was no way you could have seen this coming. Yes, you _chose_ not to give up the wrapper, but hey – why _would_ you? _I_ certainly wouldn’t – not to _Flip,_ anyway.” She jabbed her thumb in what she assumed was Flip’s direction. “With how much of a piece of work that guy is, is it any wonder that you kept turning him down, no matter how difficult he made things for you?”

Bobbie’s words ignited a spark in Lana, giving her a second wind. She glared up at the racecar driver. “Easy for _you_ to say…!” she snapped. _“Your_ actions never got any of your siblings _killed!”_

Hearing those words, Bobbie’s face fell, and her shoulders sagged, as though an immense weight had been dropped on them. “…Don’t be so sure, sport…”

Her reaction surprised Lana. “H-Huh?”

Bobbie looked at Lana with a sad little grin. “Did I ever tell you about my brother?”

“Y-Your brother…?”

Bobbie stared off into the distance, through time. “…His name was Daryl. Daryl Fletcher the Third – we called him ‘Darry’. We were twins, him and I…”

“Twins?” Lana shook her head. “W-Wait, how is that possible? I thought he said he was your _brother!”_

Bobbie chuckled. “Not all twins are identical, Lana. In fact, most of them are non-identical – _fraternal_ twins, they’re called.” Her face turned somber again. “Anyways… he was Dad’s pride and joy. The next generation of the Fletcher family, bound to one day take his rightful place behind the wheel of a stock car, tearin’ away down the track – and boy, did he never let Darry forget it. He taught Darry everything he knew about racecar driving: every twist and turn of the track, when to pull over for a pit stop and when to keep driving, how to bump his way past the other drivers to the head of the crowd, the whole shebang. And _me?”_ She waved dismissively. “I was just an _afterthought.”_

“Oh…” Lana wiped her eyes. “S-So?”

_“So,_ the one thing Dad _didn’t_ teach Darry… was how to actually _drive._ And that always frustrated Darry. Not just having to learn all of this without any hands-on experience, but also having to inherit the family mantle in general. He liked animals – he wanted to work with them, maybe be a vet or something like that. But no – the family business demanded that he be a racecar driver. And you know what? One day, I got a really stupid idea. I thought, if Dad didn’t want to teach Darry how to drive… then why didn’t Darry teach _himself?_ Or better yet, have _Grandpa_ teach him?”

“‘Grandpa’? You mean Daryl Fletcher, Sr.?”

“Yes indeed! And you know, Grandpa had been in quite a few crashes in his time behind the wheel, banged his head and neck around a fair bit. Because of that, he just wasn’t all there anymore, you know? Even so, he’d been a champion racer once, so I thought he would be as good an instructor as any…”

“Uh-oh…” Lana said. “I don’t like where this is going…”

Bobbie uttered another mirthless chuckle. “Y-You know, part of me knew, _knew,_ just how stupid of an idea it was. Darry was only 13 – of _course_ Dad hadn’t taught him how to drive yet. And Grandpa was getting on in years, his wits dribbling out his ears a little bit every day…” She sighed. “But I still suggested it to him. And when he agreed, as 13-year-old boys are wont to do with these sorts of ideas, I didn’t stop him when he cajoled Grandpa into going along with it, too – as easy as _that_ was, since I also knew that he had an itch to get back on the road again – and they got the keys to one of Dad’s fancy cars and drove off in it. Because…” She closed her eyes. “Because… a bigger part of me still had a chip on my shoulder because Darry was the favorite, and I was just… Bobbie.”

“Oh, no… W-What happened?”

Bobbie’s lips thinned. “…They went on a joyride. Darry must’ve panicked, gone way too fast, and I don’t imagine Grandpa was of much help…” She opened her eyes again. “…They plowed head-on into a semi. Neither of them made it.”

“Oh my gosh…”

Bobbie sighed. “…Yeah. The car was a wreck, and so was Dad. Mom had split from him years ago and run off with the divorce lawyer; partly because she was a bi – uh, _bad lady_ like that, and partly because she couldn’t stand all the stage mothering in our family. She didn’t come to the funeral, by the way. I wouldn’t have wanted her there, anyway…” She tossed her head at that statement. “Dad just couldn’t wrap his head around it. In his eyes, Darry had always been a smart, obedient boy – why in the heck would he throw his life away doing something as _stupid_ and _reckless_ as _that?_ He semi-retired from racing for a little while, and for the first few months, he’d just lock himself in his room for days on end, not taking meals nor seeing anyone. I got on just fine – I was already used to taking care of myself, with the help supporting me the rest of the way…” A dark look crossed her face. “And then, one night… it happened.”

“W-What? What happened?”

“I was just sitting in a chair in the den, reading a book, minding my own business. Then, Dad comes in, blind stinking drunk – he’d been drinking for a while, now. He starts yelling at me, saying that it should’ve been _me_ in that car instead of Darry. And just so you know, this was the most interaction the two of us had had in _months.”_

“Oh, jeez… What did you do?”

Bobbie shrugged. “Well, what I _didn’t_ do was confess my part in the accident – yet, anyways. I _did_ explode at him though – really let loose on him. I told him that it was _that exact attitude_ that caused this whole mess.” She straightened up. “I said, ‘I knew Darry better than you _ever_ did! And you know what? He hated what you were doing to him –_ hated_ that you were turning him into your own little mini-me! But he still went along with it, because you’d just _drilled it into his head_ that he was _destined_ to be some bigshot racecar driving hero – and so that’s what he would be! Because more than anything else, he wanted to make you_ proud!_ _That’s_ why he took the car and tried to learn how to drive early – to _impress_ you. To make _you_ happy.’” She paused, possibly reflecting a pause she made in her original speech. “‘…And now he’s _dead._ And he took Grandpa with him. Are you happy _now, _Dad? Huh?_ Are you?”_

_“Whoa…”_ Lana gulped. “S-So what did your dad do?”

“Well, first he got real quiet as I started to go off on him, and when I asked him if he was happy, well… he dropped his drink, fell flat on his bottom, and started _crying like a baby._ You might have seen that scene in movies where the one yelling at the other goes up, hugs the other person, and cries with them, making for a touching, heartwarming reconciliation scene.” She snorted. _“Nope._ I just watched him bawl his eyes out – as far as I was concerned, he deserved every bit of that guilt. But after a while, it just started getting sad, so I left him crying there on the floor, took a shower, brushed my teeth, and went to bed.” She took a deep breath. “And after that… well, things started looking up for me. Dad stopped drinking, started racing again, and he started showing me the care, love, and attention he should’ve been showing me from the day I was born. He _also_ started showing me the ins and outs of racecar driving – everything he knew. I knew what he was doing – grooming me like he’d groomed Darry – but I let him.”

“Why?”

Bobbie shrugged. “Because I felt like I owed it to Darry. To Grandpa, too. And, yeah… even to Dad. So, I gave up on my dreams of being a policewoman. I finished up my schooling, entered NASCAR soon after Dad retired – for good this time – and I kept on gunning for the championship until I earned it.” She looked off into the distance wistfully. _“Ah…_ And when I came into the winner’s circle, holding that trophy and hearing everyone cheering my name, well, _heh_… I decided that this line of work wasn’t so bad after all.”

Bobbie sighed, content, then cleared her throat. _“Ahem…_ but I’m getting off-topic.” She stood up, sat Lana on the toilet, and knelt to her level. “My point is, I know how you feel, Lana. I blamed myself for Darry and Grandpa’s deaths for the longest time. I carried it with me for years, and eventually, I came clean with Dad. He was upset, of course, but he also realized by now what a jerk he’d been before, and he forgave me. More importantly, he told me that it wasn’t _all_ my fault. Sure, taking the car out for a spin was _my_ idea, but _Darry_ was the one who agreed to it, _Grandpa_ was the one who encouraged him, and _he_ was the one who inspired that little act of rebellion to begin with. Tragedies like this rarely have only one cause, Lana – and what happened here is no exception.”

“B-But I –!” Lana protested.

“—You knew how dangerous it was, true. And you refused Flip’s offers to help. But honestly, it’s perfectly understandable. I mean, why _wouldn’t_ you? I had personal heroes myself, when I was your age – ones I would’ve _killed_ to meet. And when you earned a chance to meet _yours,_ Flip tried to extort that chance from you and sell it for quick cash. And, of course, let’s not forget – Flip knew how much trouble you and your folks were in, too, and he alone had the means to help. Instead, he left you all stuck here, overnight, all because you wouldn’t give him the wrapper that _you’d_ won fair and square.” She placed a hand on Lana’s shoulder. “So, who’s more to blame here? _You,_ for getting everyone _into_ this situation for understandable reasons; or _Flip,_ for not getting you _out_ of this situation when he had every opportunity to, for petty reasons?”

Lana let her gaze fall to her lap, where she twiddled her thumbs. “Well… I… I… _guess…_ that makes sense…”

Bobbie gave Lana a tender look, then pulled her in for a hug. “You can’t let the guilt eat you alive, Lana,” she said. “You did everything you could. And… whatever happened here… was outside of your control.”

“But we don’t _know_ that!” Lana protested. “We… We don’t know _anything! What happened here?!”_

Bobbie closed her eyes. She had a point there. She thought about how she might respond to that carefully, and after a few moments, it hit her.

Bobbie stood up, smiling. “Well…” she said, arms akimbo, “…why don’t we find out?”

Lana looked up at her. “H-Huh?”

“Well, we can’t get the police involved without forfeiting our ride back to town – Flip made that perfectly clear,” Bobbie said, inspecting her phone. “Besides, even if we wanted to get them involved anyways, we couldn’t – there’s no cell reception out here. So…” She bent over to face Lana at eye level. “…what say you and me do a little investigating ourselves?”

Lana looked both surprised and intrigued. “I-Investigate? Really? I mean, c-can we do that?”

“Why not? I’ve seen the police procedurals and mystery shows on TV – I know how these sorts of things go!” She gave Lana a sly grin. “So… how about it? Wanna solve this little mystery together? Who knows, we might find a clue or two regarding your other siblings’ whereabouts…”

_“Really?”_ Lana leaped off the toilet and bounced on her feet eagerly. “Well, come on, _come on!_ What are we waiting for? Let’s go!”

“That’s the spirit! Come on, kiddo!”

Bobbie turned and opened the stall door, and Lana rushed out and towards the exit. Bobbie was close behind, and just before the exit, she grabbed Lana’s arm.

_“Whoa_ there, tiger!” She spun Lana around, put her hands on her shoulders, knelt down, and looked her square in the eye. “I almost forgot – are you _sure_ you’re up for this? Remember, that mess back in the kitchen – that’s your _family,_ most like. Are you _sure_ you’re okay with being back in there, seeing _that_ again?”

Lana fell silent, mulling over her words. After a while, she nodded solemnly. “…I am. For the sake of my family, I _have_ to be.”

Bobbie smiled, giving Lana a light clap on the shoulder. “Atta girl. Come on.”

She stood up, and together, the two exited the women’s bathroom. Just outside, however, they saw Flip fiddling with the supply closet, wedging a spatula between the door and the frame.

“Hey, what are you doing?” Bobbie asked.

Flip jumped. _“Huh?!”_ He spun around, saw the two of them, and relaxed. “Oh, it’s jus’ you two. Ah, I’m jus’ tryin’ ta get inta this here supply closet – pickin’ the lock was a breeze, but the latch’s a bit sticky from the cold. That’s why I’m tryna jimmy it open with this here spatula!” He held up the spatula in question.

“Why?” Lana asked. “I mean, what’s in there that’s so important?”

“Brooms, mops, buckets, rags, chemicals – all sorts’a cleanin’ products!” Flip jabbed a thumb in the kitchen’s direction. “Gonna need all of ‘em ta clean up the mess in _there…!”_

“Wha –?! You can’t clean it up! It’s a _crime scene!”_ Bobbie protested.

“That’s exactly why I _gotta_ clean it up, chief! Can’t have the cops seein’ any o’ this – they’ll throw ol’ Flip in th’ slammer fer _sure!”_

_“Dang it, Flip!”_ Lana shouted. “One of my siblings is dead; the rest of them are missing; and all you can think about now is _yourself?!_ You’re _pathetic,_ you hear me?! _Spineless, shameless, gutless, and BRAINLESS!”_

Flip scowled at the little girl’s insults, but he kept his focus directed towards the closet door. Before Lana could let loose with another tirade, Bobbie put a hand on her shoulder, holding her back. “Lana, _enough,”_ she said. “This is pointless. We’re wasting time. Come on.”

With that, she took Lana by the hand and dragged her away, towards the kitchen. “We’ve just gotta give the kitchen a good once-over – get all the important details and clues before Flip has a chance to clean them u –”

Just as the two of them were about to enter the kitchen, they heard Flip scream behind them. Spinning around, the girls rushed back to the bathroom area, where they saw Flip having fallen back against the wall opposite the supply closet, holding a hand to his chest and panting.

“Flip, what’s the matter?!” Bobbie asked.

Flip swallowed thickly, gasping for breath, then raised a shaky finger to point at the closet. _“I – Th – A g – I – I d – saw a – scared th’ bejeezus outta –"_

Bobbie and Lana shared a disturbed look, then turned to the now-ajar closet door and looked inside.

The girl sitting on the floor inside attempted a scream, but only managed a weak, drawn-out whimper. She pulled her knees tightly up into her chest and scattered a broom at the two amateur investigators – a weak attempt at defense.

Bobbie was startled by the young girl’s presence, uttering a _“Jeez –!”_ and stepping back, but Lana stood transfixed. She didn’t think she’d actually meet another living soul in this restaurant after seeing the carnage back in the kitchen, but here one was, hiding in the broom closet this entire time!

And that pale skin… Those black bangs…

Lana recognized this girl.

_“Lucy!”_

Overjoyed, Lana threw her arms around her shivering elder sister’s neck, embracing her as tightly as she could and not letting go. Lucy did not return the hug, instead staring out over Lana’s shoulder, not even turning her head.

Once she was certain that Lucy was real and not going anywhere, Lana broke the hug and grabbed her by the shoulders, shaking her as she spoke. _“Lucy! What happened? Where’d everybody go? What are you doing HERE?”_ As she took a second look at her sister, she realized something odd about her appearance. “…What are you _wearing?”_

Lucy was draped in a filthy pink jacket that was much, _much_ too large for her, functioning more as a blanket than an article of clothing. Her arms’ reach was well within the sleeves, and the hem covered her legs completely. When Lana lifted a lapel to look inside and inspect the interior, she found a similarly soiled lilac coat underneath. Her curiosity piqued, and Lucy not raising any objections, she unzipped that coat to find a red coat underneath _that_ coat.

“Lucy, how many jackets are you wearing?” Lana wondered as she unzipped the red jacket. Her question was answered as she looked underneath the red jacket to find Lucy’s usual grey jacket, with the rest of her attire beneath. Lana stepped back, staring in wonder and bafflement. “Jeez, Lucy – _six_ layers of clothing?”

Bobbie nodded. “Smart – that’s bound to insulate heat. Probably how you were able to make it through the night in these temperatures…”

“Where’d you get all these coats, though…?” Lana rifled through the coats until she was back at the outermost layer. As she took a close look at it, she began to realize that it looked familiar… “Hey, wait a minute…!” She pointed at the pink coat making up the first layer. “That – That’s _Leni’s _jacket!” She opened the coat again to look at the next layer. “A-And this is _Luna’s!_ And –!” Lana’s eyes bulged as she realized what those dark stains on the coats were. “A-And they’re all splattered with _blood!_” She started shaking Lucy again, this time even harder. _“Lucy,_ _WHAT HAPPENED HERE LAST NIGHT?!”_

_“Lana!”_ Bobbie shouted, pulling Lana away. “Lana, _calm down!”_ She wrapped her up in a tight hug until she stopped kicking, struggling, and hyperventilating. “I know you’re upset, but this is _not helping!_ I mean, look at her!”

Knowing that Bobbie wouldn’t let her go until she did as she was told, Lana gritted her teeth and stomped her feet, but looked at Lucy. At first, she saw what she’d been seeing for the past five minutes: the answer to this whole riddle. But as she kept on looking, she began to notice just how much Lucy was shivering – not all of it from the cold. Her bangs still concealed her eyes, but she’d lived around Lucy long enough to know that she wasn’t looking at her. In fact, she wasn’t looking at _anything –_ she was just staring out into oblivion, lost in fear and confusion.

_“A… A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-Ahhh…” _Lucy groaned, the aimless noises simply flowing out of her throat.

Lana blinked back a tear. “L… Lucy…?”

“Look at her, Lana,” Bobbie whispered in her ear. “That look in her eyes… You probably can’t see that look, but I can. That’s the same look that my dad did after he saw Darry and Grandpa – what was left of them, at least. Her body language is saying the same thing; she _definitely_ saw something last night – and whatever it was, it traumatized her. She can tell us something useful, I’m sure…” She petted Lana’s head. “…but we have to be _gentle_ with her. Lucy isn’t my dad – she’s a scared little girl. And she doesn’t need you to yell at her – she needs you to _help_ her. Her mind’s in a fragile state; we need to coax it carefully if we want to learn, if not the _whole_ truth, then at least _part_ of it. Can you do that, Lana?”

Lana blinked, feeling guilty. Bobbie was right, this wasn’t some overbearing adult man – this was her eight-year-old sister. And whatever she must have seen last night must have been too much even for _her _morbid mind.

Lana looked at Lucy for a few moments more, then nodded. “…Okay.”

“Good.” Bobbie released Lana. “Now, you’re her sister – she’ll trust you the most. Why don’t you talk to her?”

Lana nodded again. “Right.” Slowly, step by step, she approached Lucy again. The young goth still did not look at her. Sighing, she sat down cross-legged, directly facing Lucy.

“…Hey, Lucy,” she said.

Lucy kept shivering, her teeth _click-clack_ing as they chattered against each other.

“I… I came back. Just like I promised…”

_“H… Haaaaaaaaah…”_ Lucy breathed so quietly as to be almost imperceptible if not for the steam issuing from her lips.

Lana looked at her sadly, then gently reached out and rested her hand on her knee. Lucy’s shivering abated, so that only Lana could still feel her vibrations.

Lana took a deep breath, then continued. “Lucy… I don’t know what happened here last night, but… All I know is…” Her gaze fell to the side. “…is… is that I’m sorry I wasn’t here to protect you and the others from it. I don’t know what happened here, but…” She looked at Lucy again. “…I think _you_ do. I understand if it might be hard to think back to what happened, but please… _please,_ for the sake of our family… _try to remember…”_

For several moments, Lucy was still. Lana, Bobbie, and Flip all watched her and waited with bated breath. The Burpin’ Burger was dead silent; the cold sun, rising higher, illuminated the snow surrounding the restaurant with a bright glow.

A single tear ran down Lucy’s cheek. Then, finally… she turned her head just the slightest bit.

Lana’s breath hitched in her throat. Now she could feel Lucy’s gaze on her.

“…W… W… W…”

Lana and Bobbie both leaned in. _“Yes?”_

“W… Wh… Whe…”

“I don’ geddit,” Flip said. “What’s she –”

_“Shhh!”_ Bobbie admonished him.

“Whe… When… When…?”

Lana bit her lip. “…Yes, Lucy?”

Lucy started breathing heavily, gasping the words out syllable by syllable until she was able to get them out all at once. “When…? When’d…? When’d… y-you… go…?”

Lana leaned back, quirking an eyebrow. That was it –_ that_ was what she was struggling to say? “Huh?”

“When’d you…? W-When’d you go…? When’d you go…?”

Lana looked to Bobbie for any clue as to what she might mean, but Bobbie was just as clueless as she was. Turning back to Lucy, she replied, “Uh… yesterday. Yesterday evening, remember? D…” She touched Lucy’s knee again. “Don’t you remember, Lucy?”

“When’d you go…? When’d you go? _When’d you go?”_

“I-I just…” Lana took a deep breath. “Lucy, _please,_ isn’t there… Isn’t there something… _else…_ you could tell us…?”

Suddenly, Lucy lurched forward, grabbing Lana’s shoulders as best she could with her hands still within the sleeves of Leni’s jacket. “When’d you go? When’d you go?! _When’d you go?!”_

“Lucy –!” Lana grabbed Lucy’s hands. “Lucy, I’m trying to _help you…!”_

“Ah, _forget it,_ chief! Yer wastin’ yer time!” Flip said dismissively. “The girl’s lost her marbles…”

_“Hey!”_ Lana snapped, standing up to confront him. “Hey, this is my _sister _you’re talking about, you… you, you _miserable pile of –!”_

“Hang on!” Bobbie interrupted. She stepped forward and knelt down in front of Lucy. “I just thought of something…”

“What?” Lana asked.

Bobbie laid two fingers across Lucy’s cheek, and shivered. _“Brrr…!_ Cold to the touch…” She stood up. “Well, _there’s_ our problem – Lucy’s hypothermic!”

“Hypothermic…?” Lana repeated. “But… Wait, I thought all those layers of clothing –"

“They’d _delay_ the onset of hypothermia, sure. But they wouldn’t _prevent_ it.” Bobbie patted Lucy on the head. _“That’s_ the reason why her mind’s turned to mashed potatoes. Or _part_ of it, anyway…”

“Oh… Right… Of course…” Lana knelt down in front of Lucy, grazing her pale, frigid cheek. “Spending the whole night here, in an unheated building, several degrees below freezing, without anyone to even share body warmth with…” She sighed. “If it weren’t for those coats, you’d be frozen stiff…”

“Poor thing…” Bobbie jerked her head back towards the entrance. “Come on, we should get her someplace warm.”

“Right…” Lana knew just where to go. “The plow! It’s got a heater, right? Let’s go!”

And so, Lana, Bobbie, and Flip carried Lucy out of the Burpin’ Burger and into Flip’s plow, seating her right next to a vent, turning on the engine, and cranking the heat up all the way.

Lana helped Lucy settle in. “There you go, Lucy,” she said, “it should become nice and toasty in here soon…” She spied her cup of hot cocoa in the front. “Oh!” She climbed into the front seat and grabbed it out of the cupholder. It was still one-thirds full. Crawling back into the center row, she held it in front of Lucy’s face. “Here – have the rest of my hot cocoa! It’s still warm…”

Lucy made no move to take the cup from Lana, who sighed wearily. “Come on, Lucy…” Lifting the cup to her lips, she tipped it into her mouth. The sweet, warm nectar flowed into Lucy’s mouth, and as she tasted chocolate, she seemed to spring to life, grasping the cup and gulping down its contents.

“There you go!” Lana said. “There you go…” She turned to Bobbie and nodded, smiling. Bobbie returned the smile, then gestured for Lana to come with her.

“All right,” she said, “come on, Lana. We can get some investigation done while Lucy warms up in here.”

But Lana looked at her sister, who had already finished the hot cocoa and was starting to shiver again, the heater not yet completely warmed up. She turned back to Bobbie and shook her head. “Um… why don’t _you_ go ahead?” she suggested. “I-I just want to spend some time with Lucy, make sure she’s alright, you know?”

Bobbie nodded. “I understand, sweetie. Take all the time you need. If you change your mind, you know where to find me!”

With that, she shut the door, insulating the makeshift sauna, and hopped down and headed back into the Burpin’ Burger. Flip was waiting testily by the entrance. “How long are those two gonna be in there, anyway, runnin’ the engine?” he asked. “Gas ain’t cheap – ‘specially when it comes to fuelin’ a mother like that –”

Bobbie raised her fist threateningly as she stormed towards him. “So help me, Flip,” she said, “I will punch you in that _big frog mouth_ of yours if you don’t _shut it right now!”_

Flip stepped aside, intimidated, and Bobbie threw the doors open and re-entered the restaurant with a huff. Flip rolled his eyes and scoffed. _“Women…”_

Lana watched them go, then cuddled up with Lucy, who appeared to be nodding off after a long, stressful night. Resting her head on her shoulder, she appreciated the cozy warmth the heater was now generating, and soon she began to feel her eyelids droop…

(…)

When Lana awoke, she was in a location she didn’t recognize, but felt familiar. Was it the Burpin’ Burger? Could’ve been – what few windows there were had huge snow piles stacked against them. It looked like she was snowed in again – where was the shovel?

She saw a fireplace, and as she approached it, looking for a shovel, she stopped as she realized that there was someone standing in front of it, with his back turned to her.

Lana didn’t know how she knew, but somehow, she knew that this person… was her father.

“…Dad?”

There was a scraping sound, like something being sharpened. “Sweetheart…” Lana’s father said, “…do you love Daddy?”

Lana didn’t like the undertone in his voice. “Of… Of course I do, Dad…”

Lana’s father fell quiet for a few moments before responding, “…Good. And… you know I love you too, right? You and Jackie?”

Lana took a step back. She couldn’t explain it, but there was some kind of… _aura_ around him. Something _unnatural._ “…Yeah…?”

She heard her father utter a low chuckle. “Yes… that’s right… Daddy loves you, sweetie…”

He turned around to face her… and it was now that she saw that he was carrying an axe.

_“…but Daddy has to EAT.”_

Lana’s father started advancing on her, brandishing the axe above his head. Lana tried to escape, but the exits were blocked by snow, and he had moved too fast, herding her into a corner, unable to get past him without a fatal encounter with an axe head. There was nowhere to run; nowhere to hide; and nothing to do except _beg._

“No…! Dad,_ no!”_

But her pleas were in vain. Lana’s father raised the axe high, bloodlust in his eyes.

_“DAD!”_

The axe came down… and Lana woke up.

She jolted awake, panting and bathed in a cold sweat, despite the heat. As she looked around, she recalled her surroundings, and breathed a sigh of relief.

“A dream… Just a dream…” Lana said to herself. “Must’ve dozed off…” She chuckled. Her family would _never_ do something like _that!_ What would Lisa have called it? _The subconscious manifestation of your guilt,_ or something like that? Probably…

Thinking about her younger sister led Lana to start thinking about the rest of her siblings, too, and her smile vanished. Remembering Lucy, who was still sitting sleeping peacefully next to Lana, she cozied up next to her and curled up into her chest, taking advantage of Lucy’s exhausted state to reach a level of intimacy that the gloomy girl would never normally allow. Right now, Lucy was the only family Lana had left – and she was determined not to let her go, like she did the others.

_“Mmmmn…”_ Lucy moaned.

“Oops, sorry Lucy,” Lana said. “Didn’t mean to wake you.”

_“Mmm…”_

Lana could tell that Lucy was still badly shaken from her ordeal, so she decided not to try asking about last night again. Instead, she took the opportunity to say something that she should have said long ago.

“Hey, you know…” She cleared her throat. “I… I never did thank you guys for coming with me to the Burpin’ Burger to help me win the contest.” She cracked a smile. “Granted, your main reason for coming was to avoid eating Dad’s thawed goulash, but still…” She looked up at Lucy. “…you knew how much this meant to me. And you knew how bad the weather was. You could’ve dragged me out of the place kicking and screaming at any time. But… you _didn’t._ You stuck with me to the very end, just to help me make my dream come true.”

Lana pulled out the winning wrapper, admiring it. As she recalled what had happened after she’d gotten it, though, her mood turned somber. “And… because of that, all _this_ happened. Everyone’s _gone._ Somebody’s _dead,_ and I have _no idea_ who or how…”

_“W… When…”_ Lucy croaked. _“When’d… you… go…?”_

Lana shook her head. “Right, right, whatever. Point is, you guys did _so much_ for me, and got _this_ for it – whatever _this_ is…” She waved her hand around in the air, indicating the general situation. “It’s just not right, you know? I wish I could –”

_– make things right,_ she was about to say, when it dawned on her. She sat up, looking at the restaurant. She remembered Bobbie’s story back in the bathroom, and knew that, just as she’d gotten them into this mess, it was her responsibility, as their sister, to get them _out._

She owed them that much, at least.

Lana inched away from Lucy and grabbed Luna’s jacket off the floor (Lucy had discarded it and Leni’s jacket because it was getting too hot). As she bunched it together into a ball, she said, “Listen, Lucy, I have to go now, okay?”

Hearing that she was about to leave her, Lucy summoned what little strength she had to try to stop her, but her feeble attempted amounted to naught. Lana reassured her as she laid her head down on Leni’s balled-up jacket like a pillow.

_“Shhh…_ it’s okay, Lucy, it’s okay…” She grabbed Leni’s jacket and laid it over Lucy like a blanket. “I’m not leaving you again – I’ll just be inside the building…” She placed a hand on Lucy’s head. “Get some rest, okay? I’ll be back…”

Although it pained her to do so, Lana left Lucy behind in the plow and went back inside the Burpin’ Burger, heading straight into the kitchen.

There was work to be done.

Bobbie Fletcher was squatting over the pile of bones, organizing them in a particular order. Flip, meanwhile, was doing what Flip did best – nothing.

“Hey, Lana!” Bobbie said as the six-year-old walked in. “Have a nice nap?”

Lana stretched. _“Ah…_ Mm-hmm. How’s the investigation going? Did I miss anything important?”

“Afraid not, sweetie – it’s been slow going the past two hours…” Bobbie stood up and stretched out her back. “We haven’t gotten a chance to investigate the rest of the crime scene – I’ve been preoccupied with the body, and Flip over there has been preoccupied with _not_ being preoccupied…”

Lana chuckled at her joke, then shook her head. “Wait – how did you convince Flip not to clean up the crime scene and let you investigate?”

“Ah, I told him that if he let me investigate first, and didn’t tell the cops, then _I_ wouldn’t tell the cops about there being a crime scene to begin with.”

_“What?!”_ Lana shouted.

_“Shhh!” _Bobbie raised a finger to her lips, then motioned for her to kneel down out of Flip’s line of sight and keep it down. Lana did so, frowning, and Bobbie joined her. _“We’ll have to crack this case ourselves,”_ she whispered. _“And even if we don’t, well… once you get back to town, Detective Flanagan asked for story, didn’t you? YOU didn’t promise to keep anything secret…”_

Lana’s face lit up._ “Ah…! Wait – does Flip know that?”_

_“Well…”_ Bobbie looked in Flip’s direction, then winked at Lana. _“…what he doesn’t know will DEFINITELY hurt him!”_

Lana shared a quiet snicker with Bobbie. Then, as they both stood up, she cleared her throat. “So… have you found out anything from the body?”

Bobbie showed her the work she’d done so far, and it was now that Lana saw that the bones had been arranged in the approximate shape they would be if they were a whole skeleton. “Well, a little… The thing about this skeleton is, all its bits and pieces have been broken up into even _smaller_ bits and pieces…” She gestured to the skull as an example, showing the mandible, the face plate, and the smashed cranium. “It’s been hard matching all the pieces together – it’s like a big, complicated, 3-D jigsaw puzzle. Some pieces are more intact than others, though – like the spinal column, and the pelvis. Judging by the shape of the pelvis –”

“‘Pelvis’?”

“Uh… _hip bone.”_

“Oh.”

“—I’d say that this victim was female.”

“F-Female?” Lana said. “How can you tell?”

“Well… W-Well, see…” Bobbie blushed, kneeling down to Lana’s level. “Lana… did your parents ever tell you where babies come from?”

Lana shook her head. “No, but I think I figured it out. I have two younger sisters, Lisa and Lily. They both came from my mom’s belly. That’s where babies come from, right? Moms’ bellies?”

“Ah –_ yes! _Yes,_ exactly!_ That’s right, Lana! Well done!” Bobbie said, while breathing a quiet sigh of relief over not having to give a six-year-old “the talk”. “Babies come from mommies’ bellies! And, for those babies to come out, they have to, uh… _squeeze_ _past_ the hip bone, see?”

“Like poop? Wait – you mean moms can _poop out BABIES?”_

Bobbie’s face twisted into an awkward grin. _“…Kinda?”_

_“Whoooooa…!”_ Lana said, mouth agape. “That’s _awesome!_ How do they do that?!”

_“Not the point – ahem,_ the point is, Lana, girls need special hip bones to have babies. That’s why their hip bones look different from boys’ hip bones. And _that…”_ She pointed to the pelvis of the victim. “…is how we can tell that this skeleton belongs to a girl.”

“Ohhhh…” Lana shook her head. “But – wait, _which_ girl? I have _ten_ sisters – it could be any one of them!”

“That’s what I’m working on right now, sport. If I can reconstruct this skeleton, I can get a rough measurement of how tall she was. Then, we cross-check it with the ages of your sisters, taking into consideration the average heights of girls of certain ages, and we _should_ have enough to make an educated guess as to the identity of this body.”

Lana listened to her idol talk with stars in her wide eyes. “Whoa, _cool…_ How do you come up with this stuff?”

Bobbie smiled. “I watch a lot of police procedurals on TV. Murder mysteries, too – I know how this dance goes…”

“Wow…” Lana looked down at the incomplete skeleton. “So, um… when do you think you’ll be done?”

“Not anytime soon, I can promise you _that,” _Bobbie said resignedly, turning and squatting back down to continue to reassemble the skeleton.

“W-Well…” Lana started wringing her hands. “…is there anything _I _could do to help?”

Bobbie grinned, turning around to put her hand on her shoulder. “Well, _dang,_ Lana – I thought you’d never ask! Sure, two pairs of eyes are better than one – we can divide the investigative workload between us and cover more ground if we work together!”

Lana bounced on the balls of her feet. _“All right!_ Where do I start?”

“You got a phone?”

“Phone? No… I left mine back home…”

Bobbie pulled out her cellphone and handed it to Lana. “Take mine. Go around the Burpin’ Burger, investigate anything out of the ordinary. That big pool of blood you slipped on when we first got here is a good start.” She made Lana look her in the eyes. “Now, before you do _anything_ with a clue or piece of evidence, _take a picture of it._ Also, keep those gloves on – we don’t want to be leaving fingerprints all over the crime scene! Look for anything that might be a clue or evidence, and bring it to me. Got it?”

Lana nodded. “Yes, ma’am!”

“All right! Hop to it, then, sport!”

Lana wasted no time in doing so, starting with the blood stains on the floor as per Bobbie’s recommendation. Now that there was a little more light in the restaurant, she could get a better look at just how big it was. Lana gulped, her stomach churning. Just how much blood was a person’s body supposed to have?

She was about to take a careful step onto the blood pool when she remembered Bobbie’s instructions. Taking the phone and pulling up the camera, Lana snapped pictures of the pool from several different angles. As she studied the photos, one detail that had escaped her earlier made itself known – there was something else in the pool besides frozen bits of coagulated blood.

Inching around the pool, Lana reached out and picked up the object by her fingertips. She swallowed hard as she held it – some things were too grody even for _her._ _“Urg…!_ B-Bobbie!”

“What is it, Lana?” Bobbie asked.

“I-I found something!”

“Come show me!”

Cringing, Lana brought it over and quickly handed it off to Bobbie. Bobbie grasped the object by the handle and looked it over. “A meat tenderizer…” she observed. “And there’s blood on it, too…”

“Yeah, I found it in that pool of blood…” Lana said.

“Hmm…” Bobbie rotated it, scrutinizing the meat tenderizer’s tenderizing face more closely. “And what’s this?” She picked some particles off of the points of the tenderizers. “Looks like… bits of hair, and flesh…”

Lana gagged, but managed to muscle her stomach contents down. “So… what does that mean?”

Bobbie arched an eyebrow. “…Elementary, my dear Lana. You see…” She gestured to the body’s broken skull. “…most of these bones are broken. It takes a great deal of force to break bones by hand – at least, without the aid of _tools…”_

“Tools?”

“Yes…” Bobbie held up the meat tenderizer. “Like this meat tenderizer.”

“Oh, s-so… So, you’re saying that… whoever did _this…_ used the meat tenderizer to break their bones?”

“That’s my theory. And that’s not all. Where do you usually find hair on a person, Lana?”

“…The _head?”_

“Precisely. So, how do you suppose these bits of hair got onto this meat tenderizer, hm?”

“They… um…” She thought about it. Then, it connected. “If… If someone… _hit_ someone… over the head with it…”

_“Exactly._ And if said someone were to hit someone over the head with it hard enough to, oh, _leave bits of flesh sticking to it,_ say, well…” Bobbie shook her head. “…then that other person would go down _hard._ A few more times like that, and they’d never get up again.”

Lana’s eyes widened. “So… you’re saying…?”

“Right now, it’s just a hunch. But until we find anything proving otherwise…” Bobbie held up the meat tenderizer. “…I do believe we have our _murder weapon.”_

Lana stared at the meat tenderizer and gulped hard. This thing… _killed_ one of her sisters…

She was startled out of her daze by Bobbie giving her a congratulatory clap on the shoulder. “Hey, great job, kiddo! Great find!” She handed the meat tenderizer back to Lana. “Put this back _exactly_ where and how you found it, then see what else you can find!”

Hearing Bobbie praise her reassured Lana, if only slightly, and she nodded. “R-Right!”

Lana went back to the frozen pool of blood on the floor and carefully replaced the meat tenderizer, remembering to snap a picture of it up close. Stepping back, she took another look at the pool of blood, sweeping her gaze over it… and froze. The blood’s trail extended all the way to the freezer door, growing thinner and straighter.

In fact… it might even have extended _under_ the freezer door.

Almost like something was dragged in there…

Lana ran up to the freezer door and started tugging on it. The handle turned, but the door didn’t budge. No matter how hard she tried, it was useless. Grunting in frustration, Lana stepped back, looking the door up and down, trying to think of a way to open it. Maybe it just needed more force?

She turned around and looked at Flip, still trying his hardest not to get involved. _“Hey, Flip!”_ she shouted. “Wanna make yourself useful, and help me open this?”

Flip waved dismissively at her. _“Bah!”_ he scoffed. “Do it yerself! Or get Bippity Fletchman over there ta do it for ya!”

“Oh, letting all the women do the work, Flip?” Bobbie taunted. “Just goes to show what kind of man you are – or should I say, _aren’t!”_

Lana laughed with her, and Flip’s face turned red. He stopped leaning against the wall and stomped up to the freezer, shoving Lana aside. _“Move it,”_ he growled. Seizing hold of the handle, he twisted it and pulled with all his might, straining until the veins in his neck bulged. The door groaned, then swung open as the seal was broken. Panting, Flip wiped his brow and presented the open freezer to Lana and Bobbie. “There, see? That’s how a _man_ does it!”

“Why, _thank you,_ Flip!” Bobbie said sardonically. “What a great help you are!”

_“Bah!”_ Flip replied, scowling.

With access to the freezer now available, Lana took a look inside. Just as she suspected, the blood trail continued into the freezer, leading to a similar but smaller pool of blood inside. “Hey… Hey, guys!” she called over her shoulder. “Come take a look at _this!”_

Bobbie left her impromptu autopsy behind and walked over, and Flip, seized with curiosity at what other evidence remained to be cleaned up, couldn’t resist either. As they entered the freezer, Lana finished taking a picture of the scene and pointed at the blood. “Look!” she said. “See those drag lines? They lead in _here!”_

“Hey!” Bobbie patted Lana on the back. “Good eye, sport! Good eye!”

“All right, but _so what?”_ Flip asked.

Bobbie shrugged. “Well, let’s see…” She inspected both pools of blood, and the trail between them. “Hmm… I think the murder occurred _here…”_ She pointed at the blood pool outside the freezer. “…and the body was dragged in _here_ afterwards.” She pointed at the pool inside the freezer.

“Why do you think that?” Lana asked.

“Well, the pool of blood in _here_ is smaller. As a rule of thumb, the fresher a corpse is, the more blood it has to spill. So, if there is more blood out _there_ than there is in _here…”_

“…then the body bled out more _there_ than_ here,_ which means it must’ve been _there_ first!” Lana concluded.

_“Very good,_ Lana!” Bobbie said, smiling and tousling Lana’s… er, _hat._ “I knew you were a smart kid!”

Lana lapped up her praise and her affectionate gesture to her head, but then asked, “But… why would they bring the body in _here?_ To hide it?”

“Don’t think so,” Bobbie replied. “If they _were_ trying to hide the body here, we wouldn’t have found the bones in the kitchen.”

“Then what’re you two gettin’ at?” Flip asked, annoyed. He wrinkled his nose. “And _what’s that smell?”_

Bobbie sniffed the air, and held her nose. _“Ugh…!”_

Lana smelled it now, too. She knew this smell… knew it all too well. “…It’s _poop!”_

Bobbie and Flip both hesitantly smelled the air again, and nodded, voicing their agreement. Lana took in the smell some more. “…And it’s coming from over _here!”_ She pointed at the smaller blood pool in the freezer. “And hey – if you look closely, you can even see little chunks of poop here and there!”

“Aw, _gross…!”_ Flip said, not looking.

“And… _hmm…”_ Lana scratched her chin, studying the pool and its coloration. “Hey… this stuff… I-I don’t think it’s _poop,_ per se…” She turned around and looked up at Bobbie. “I think it’s _fecal matter!”_

Bobbie scratched her head. “What’s the difference?”

“Well, see…” Lana pointed at different areas of her belly as she launched into her lecture. “…food passes through the digestive tract, see? And that includes the small and large intestines, right? Well, after it passes through the small intestine, th-the small intestine has absorbed most of the nutrients, see? A-And all that’s left is the leftovers. The large intestine’s job is to suck out anything else that the body can use from the leftovers, like water and vitamins, and the rest gets passed out the butt as poop. But that’s only at the end of the large intestine – before it gets to the rectum, it’s known as ‘fecal matter’.”

Bobbie stared at Lana, impressed. “Dang, sport,” she said, “how did you know all that?”

“Oh! I’ve studied quite a bit about the digestive system – I’m really curious to know what happens to all those worms and bugs I eat!”

Flip looked disgusted, but Bobbie only laughed. “You sure are something special, Lana Loud…” she said.

Lana blushed, stuffing her hands in her pockets and kicking her foot back and forth, scuffing the floor._ “Heh, heh…”_ she chuckled. “Aw, _go on…”_

“I mean it!” Bobbie took a deep breath, surveying the scene with the new information in mind. “Well, if that’s the case… then why would there be fecal matter mixed in with the blood?” she wondered. “Unless…”

“U-Unless _what?”_ Lana asked.

Bobbie scratched her chin. “Maybe…” She pointed at the blood-and-fecal-matter pool. “Maybe… if fecal matter is only found in the large intestine… then maybe someone emptied out the contents of the large intestine in here?”

“Huh? ‘Emptied’ them? How? _Why?”_

Bobbie uttered a dark chuckle. “Maybe you were right, Flip…”

Flip gave her a bemused look. _“Heh?_ What’s that, chief?”

Bobbie turned back towards the kitchen area. “Maybe this place _is_ a slaughterhouse now…”

She walked out of the freezer, leaving Lana and Flip behind. The two of them looked at each other, shrugged, and followed her.

Bobbie had returned to analyzing and sorting the bones. “You know,” Lana said to her, “looking at all this blood on the floor has gotten me thinking…”

“Hm?” Bobbie said, eyes still on the bones.

“If there’s so much blood on the floor, then wouldn’t it be hard not to step in it? W-When it was still wet, I mean.”

“Sure would, sport!”

“Then… shouldn’t there be footprints? Maybe _that_ might be a clue as to who the killer might be!”

“You make a good point, sweetie,” Bobbie said, “but there are a couple of problems with that. First: there _are_ bloody footprints on the floor there – I saw that much before I started focusing on this body. Problem is, there are too many footprints to make any one out clearly. Second: even if there _were_ footprints we could make out clearly, it wouldn’t be much use to us. I mean, honestly – how often do you look at the soles of a person’s shoes?”

Lana thought about it and, realizing she was right, slumped her shoulders. “Yeah… I get it…”

“If we had a forensic expert with us, that’d be a solid lead. Otherwise, we’d best not waste any time on it. In any case…” She nodded at Lana. “…good job with those blood pools, kiddo. Why don’t you look for more clues? Try the main dining area.”

“The dining…?” Lana snapped her fingers. “Of course! That’s where we were all sitting!”

She rushed out of the kitchen and ran to the booth where she and her siblings had sat, scouring it from top to bottom. In between the back cushion and the seat cushion, she found something, pulling it out and taking a look at it.

“A cellphone…” she said. It still had a little juice – when she pressed a button, it sprang to life. A picture of Lori and Bobby made up the background. _“Lori’s_ cellphone…!”

Lana ran back to the kitchen, waving the cellphone high. _“Bobbie!”_ she shouted. “Bobbie, look what I found!”

“What is it, sport?” Bobbie asked.

Lana showed her. “It’s a cellphone – my _sister’s_ cellphone!”

“Okay – do you know _whose?”_

“I told you, it’s my _sister’s!”_ Lana thought about what she just said, and shook her head, “Er – my sister _Lori’s_ cellphone! Look –” She activated it, showing Bobbie the background. “—look, that’s her and her boyfriend!”

“I see,” Bobbie said. “But there’s still no cell reception out here, so what’s your point, kiddo?”

“Don’t you get it?” Once again, Lana realized she wasn’t being clear, and shook her head. “Er, well, Lori talks to and texts her friends and boyfriend _all the time –_ plus, she’s got more photos and selfies on it than all our family photo albums _combined!_ This cellphone means more to her than her _life!”_ She cradled the cellphone in her hands, shaking her head. “Why… why would she leave it behind…?”

“Hmm…” Bobbie scratched her chin, taking a look at the cellphone. “Well, if it’s as valuable to her as you say… then if she left it behind and didn’t come back for it…” She furrowed her brows. “…then she must have left this place in a hurry, and didn’t dare come back for whatever reason…”

“Do…” Lana looked around. “Do you think it had something to do with what happened here last night?”

“I don’t _think,_ Lana – I_ know.”_ She sighed. “Well… good job, sweetie. Hang on to that phone – it’s evidence now. Keep looking around for more clues. Take your time while you’re at it, ‘cause this…” She looked at the skeleton she’d arranged and shook her head. “This… might take a while…”

Hearing the weariness in her voice, Lana knelt down next to her. “What’s wrong? Maybe I can help…”

Bobbie was about to tell her to leave her be, but she reconsidered, recalling how useful she had been so far, and changed her mind. “Well… all right.” She showed Lana the skeleton, whose parts appeared to be mostly rearranged in their proper order. “This is what I’ve got so far.”

Lana looked the skeleton over, then shrugged. “…What’s wrong with it? Looks right to me…”

“I think so, too. Judging by the bones alone, this girl was about, oh… I’d say somewhere between 5’4” and 5’6”, give or take. If we were to assume that she was the average height of a girl her age, that would make her about, hmm… 15? 16, maybe? Definitely mid- to late-teens – _way_ too big to be anything younger.”

“‘Mid- to late-teens…’” Lana repeated, looking at the bones. _So… it CAN’T be Lynn, she was too short_ _– she was always complaining about that. So… either Lori, Leni, Luna, or Luan. It’s GOT to be. But which one…?_

“I can figure _that_ much from what I have now. The problem…” She pointed to a smaller pile of bones nearby. “…is with _that –_ the ‘crank pile’. Those are all the bits and pieces of bone that just don’t fit _anywhere._ It’s puzzling…” She snorted. “…which is kinda appropriate, seeing as how this is a bit like a morbid jigsaw puzzle…”

Lana was not amused, but chose to direct her attention towards the ‘crank pile’ rather than Bobbie’s tasteless joke. She sifted through the pile, poring over each of the bones’ details carefully. She found one tiny fragment of bone, looking for where its breaks started and stopped – and froze.

“This…” she said, “…this is a _tooth.”_

“Come again, sweetie?” Bobbie said.

“This isn’t a bone – or, well, a bone _fragment –_ this is a _tooth!_ A tiny, little baby tooth!”

“A tooth?” Bobbie scratched her head, looking back at the skeleton. “But I’ve got all the teeth right here! Let me see that…!” She took the tooth from Lana, inspecting it and comparing it to the teeth the skeleton already had. The rogue tooth appeared to be an incisor, which neither the maxilla nor the mandible was missing. Besides, this tooth appeared much too small for this –

A light bulb went off in Bobbie’s head. “Of course…” she whispered. _“Of course…!_ How could I have missed it?!”

“Huh?” Lana said. “Missed _what?_ What are you talking about?”

Bobbie turned to her with a jubilant smile on her face. _“Lana!”_ She embraced the six-year-old, kissing her on both cheeks. “Lana, you little Sherlock – you’ve _cracked the case!”_

Lana just stared at her, baffled. “What?! I still don’t get it!”

“It’s all crystal clear now!” She pointed from the skeleton to the ‘crank pile’. “There wasn’t _one_ skeleton in the pile – there were _two!”_

That number slammed Lana like a punch to the gut. “T-T-T-_Two?!”_

“Yes! You see, the human skeleton has 206 bones – but it doesn’t _start_ that way. Human _infants_ are born with 270 bones, which fuse together as a child grows older.” Bobbie pointed at the ‘crank pile’ again. “Those weren’t bone fragments in the ‘crank pile’ – those were bones that simply hadn’t fused together yet! Don’t you see, Lana? There are _two_ bodies – one teenage girl, and one _infant!”_

“I-Infant –?!” Lana choked. The room started to spin. It couldn’t be… It _couldn’t _be…!

What kind of person could be so _cruel?!_

She fell to her knees, clutching the sides of her head and screaming. _“No…! NO! NOOOOO!” _She shut her eyes, but the tears still found their way through. _“Not…! Not Lily! NOT LILY! **NOOOOOOO!”**_

Flip, who – disregarding the fact that the entire restaurant was now a crime scene – had just finished using the facilities, came back to see what all the fuss was about, while Bobbie watched Lana wail and cry, the guilt crushing her heart. Sighing heavily, she scooped Lana up and let her cry into her shoulder, stroking her hair.

“I’m sorry, Lana…” she said, “…I’m so sorry. I… I got so excited about investigating a mystery, just like they do on TV, that…” She closed her eyes. “…that I forgot that this is your _family_ we’re dealing with here…”

Lana just buried her face in Bobbie’s jacket and kept bawling her eyes out, bitterly mourning the death of her baby sister. Bobbie held her close, rocking her up and down and whispering soothingly, urging her to let it all out. Even Flip was moved by the sight of Lana in shambles, though only slightly, and his answer was to go into the dining area and leave her alone, partially to get away from the noise as well.

Lana cried for a full 20 minutes before her tears finally ran dry. When all she had left was raspy chokes and hiccups, Bobbie set her down. “…Feel better?” she asked.

Lana wiped off her puffy eyes and runny nose. _“…Mmm.”_

Bobbie gave her a concerned look. “Maybe you should just rest in the plow with your sister…”

Lana shook her head. “No…! _No!_ I _have_ to keep going! I _HAVE_ to find out who did this!”

“Are you sure? Because everything else I’ve found from these bones gets pretty disturbing…”

Lana knew she wasn’t exaggerating, based on her tone. But she shook her head again. “I can’t imagine it can get any worse _now…”_

“Don’t be so sure.” Bobbie knelt down, picking up a rib bone. “But if you _must_ know… these bones have all been picked clean. The marrow’s been sucked out, too. And, if you look closely…” She brought the bone closer, pointing at nearly indistinguishable marks on it. “…you can see _teeth marks_ on the bones. The only explanation for all of this is that not only were your sisters murdered…” She took a deep breath, not welcoming Lana’s reaction to what she was going to say next:

“…they were_ cannibalized.”_

Lana, however, only stared blankly at her. “Can… _‘Cannible-eyes’? _What the heck does _that_ mean?”

Bobbie grimaced, shaking her head. Now, she had to _explain_ it to her. “Well, Lana, I… I don’t know how else to tell you this, but…” She sighed. “…‘cannibalism’ is when a person, well…_ eats…_ another person.”

“‘Eats’…?” It sank in slowly, but when it hit Lana, it hit _hard._ Her eyes bulged out, and her stomach roiled. She felt dizzy, nauseous. To think… To think that… _that…_ had happened to Lily and another one of her sisters…!

It was too much – Lana felt the contents of her stomach surging up her throat. She choked it down long enough to rush out of the kitchen and out into the snow, then fell to her knees and retched. She may have enjoyed being disgusting, but _this…_ this was something else entirely. This was… _abominable!_

_“Lana!”_ Bobbie called out. She ran outside after her and, seeing her kneeling in the snow next to a steaming puddle of her own vomit, trudged up to her and patted her on the back. “Well,” she said, “I tried to warn you…”

Lana spat out another wad of bile, wiped her mouth on her sleeve, and nodded.

“Are you _sure_ you want to keep going, Lana?”

Lana hung her head. “…No. I don’t want to…”

Bobbie took her by the arm, but she shook off her hand and stood up on her own.

“…but I _have_ to.”

Bobbie stepped back, blown away by Lana’s spirit and determination. This was more than an inquisitive little girl who loved racing sports like she did – this was a kindred spirit. “Lana…”

Lana noticed her look. “Hm? What?”

Bobbie shook her head, covering her mouth. “Nothing, it’s just…” With glistening eyes, she knelt down and placed a hand on Lana’s shoulder. “It’s just… I’m so _proud of you,_ you know? Forcing yourself to do this for the sake of your family…”

Lana thumped her chest. “I got them into this mess – the least I can do is clean it up.”

Bobbie nodded, smiling warmly. “…That’s my girl.”

Lana shared the tender moment with her, then her eyes drifted over Bobbie’s shoulder. “Hey… how did we get outside, anyways?”

“Hm? Outside…?” To Bobbie’s surprise, she found that yes, they _were_ outside. Lana, it seemed, was in too much of a hurry to throw up to notice, and she was too busy hurrying after her. “Huh… will you look at that…”

They appeared to be behind the Burpin’ Burger, near the dumpster. There was an open doorway on the right side of the back wall – that must have been where the two of them had run out. Backtracking to the interior, they looked around and saw that the door itself was lying on the ground in front of them.

“I _thought _I felt a draft,” Lana said. “How come we didn’t notice this before?”

Bobbie shrugged. “I guess we were too busy looking at the pile of human bones…”

Lana considered it, then nodded. She made a fair point.

Bobbie inspected the frame that the door used to hang from. “Huh… this door’s been ripped off its hinges…” She turned to Lana. “Lana? The camera?”

“Camera…?_ Oh!_ Right!” Lana pulled out Bobbie’s cellphone and started snapping pictures of the door, the doorframe, and the busted hinges. Once she was satisfied that she had taken enough, she asked Bobbie, “So, what do you think?”

“I think…” Bobbie knelt down by the door, looking at the twisted scraps of metal that used to be its hinges. “…that whatever tore off this door…” She lifted the door up with both hands, noting that the side that faces the outside was unmarred. “…must have been _monstrously_ strong.”

“Must have…” Just then, Lana noticed something peculiar on the floor. “Hey… look at that!”

“What?”

Lana pointed. _“That!_ Those prints on the floor?”

Bobbie took a closer look, and noticed some small, strange, bloody prints where Lana was pointing. They led from the kitchen interior, where the large blood pool was, out the back door that she and Lana had just exited and come back through.

“A trail…”

“A trail of _footprints!”_ Lana ran up to a particularly clearly distinguishable print and knelt beside it, taking a few pictures. “But… _huh._ I’ve never seen prints like _these_ before… I mean, they _look_ like a wild animal’s tracks, but…”

Bobbie knelt beside her. “But what? What do they look like?”

Lana scratched her chin. “Well…” She pointed at the portion of the print below the toes. “You see this? This means that this animal is digitigrade.” When she looked up, she saw Bobbie staring at her uncomprehendingly. “…Uh, that is, this animal walks on its _toes.”_

“Ah! I see… So, are there any wild animals around these parts that walk on their toes?”

“W-Well, my first guess would be _wolves,_ but the closest ones live all the way over in Tall Timbers Park. And look…” She pointed at the toeprints. “This animal has five toes – wolves have five toes, too, but only _four_ of them touch the ground. Besides…” She gave a little shrug. “…it’s too big to be a wolf’s print.”

“Ah, I see…”

“And you know what else? Hang on…” Lana stood up and traced the prints outside. The snow was piled up just as thickly out back as it was around the front and sides, but whatever had made the tracks was powerful to plow right through it, gouging the snow out in front of it just by running. Lana followed the trail, being careful not to disturb the prints, and Bobbie followed close behind.

“…You see this trail?” Lana said, pointing. “See how spaced out the tracks are? Judging by this thing’s gait, it _has _to be bipedal – er, that is, it walks on two legs. You know, like us…”

“Bipedal? Hmm…” Bobbie racked her mind for any bipedal wild animals that might be in the area. “Maybe it was a _bear?_ Bears can walk on their hind legs…”

“They can _stand _on them, sure, but they can’t _walk _on them. And they certainly can’t _run_ on them – not the way this thing did. And even if they _could,_ these tracks are too far apart for a bear’s gait. Besides, bears are _plantigrade; _they walk on their toes and heels, just like us. This thing is digitigrade, like I said. And I’ve never heard of any bears coming this close to town, either…” Lana shook her head, stumped. “Whatever this thing is, it’s not a _bear;_ it’s not a _wolf;_ and it’s not a _human being.”_ She shrugged. “I don’t know what the heck it is…”

Bobbie took one last look at the mystery creature’s trail, frowning. “I… I see…”

Lana’s eyes followed the tracks as they wound around the side of the building. “Where does this trail go, I wonder?”

Bobbie offered a resigned shrug. “…Let’s find out, I guess…”

She and Lana began tracing the trail around the Burpin’ Burger, being careful not to disturb the tracks. After winding around the side, they appeared to head straight for the nearby woods. They followed them as far as they dared, then stopped. Lana pointed at the woods. “…Looks like it ran off that way,” she said.

Bobbie nodded. “Looks like it…” Sighing, she nudged Lana’s shoulder. “Come on, let’s head back inside.”

By now, the two of them were northeast of the Burpin’ Burger. They turned to head back in through the front, but Lana tripped and fell almost right away.

“Lana! Are you all right?” Bobbie asked.

Lana raised her head, brushing off her faceful of snow. _“Mmph…_ fine. What happened?”

She tried getting up on one knee, but was only able to raise her leg so far before it got caught. Turning onto her back, she looked at her feet and saw that they were tangled in something. Lana reached down and freed her feet, looking at what had tripped her.

“A scarf?” Bobbie said.

“A white scarf,” Lana confirmed. “Must’ve blended in with the snow…”

This scarf looked familiar – where had Lana seen it before? Maybe… Maybe one of her siblings was wearing it? Who, then? Lincoln? …No, his scarf was blue. Leni? …No, her scarf was pink. Luan? …No, she didn’t even _wear_ a scarf. Lana tried running through each of her siblings from oldest to youngest, until she remembered.

“Lynn…!” Lana held up the scarf. “…This is _Lynn’s_ scarf! What is it doing all the way out here…?”

Bobbie shrugged. “…Beats me.”

Lana looked up at her with a quirked eyebrow. _That_ didn’t sound at all like her. What was going on?

Before she could ask, however, Bobbie turned and headed back inside, and Lana had no choice but to follow her. They came in through the front doors, startling Flip, who was napping in a nearby booth.

_“Snrk – HUH?! Wha –?!_ Who – you two? What’re you doin’ here? Thought you were in the back…”

“We _were –_ we went out the back and circled around the building,” Lana replied.

“There’s a back door?”

“Yeah – guess you didn’t notice it, either…”

“So _that’s_ where that draft was comin’ from!”

“Yeah, and that’s not all – we found tracks that… belonged to _something. _Some kind of animal we’ve never seen before…”

“An_ animal?”_ Flip sprang to his feet, relieved. “W-Well,_ there ya go,_ chief – _there’s_ yer culprit! This weren’t no murder – it was jus’ a wild animal attack!” He folded his arms with a smug grin on his face. “Can’t fault me fer_ that,_ can ya?”

“Oh, _can it,_ Flip!” Lana snapped. “Don’t forget, _you’re_ the one who left us trapped here with whatever it was that killed my sisters!”

“O-Oh, _yeah?_ Well, _tough toenails,_ chief! ‘Cuz if ya go ta Flanagan wit’ all this, _I’ll_ go ta him wit’ how _you_ tampered wit’ a crime scene! How do ya like _that,_ huh?”

Lana laughed out loud. “Flip, you _moron!_ Don’t you get it?” She turned to Bobbie. “Tell him, Bobbie!”

She looked at Bobbie expectantly, but Bobbie kept her back to both of them, standing with her hands on her hips.

“Bobbie?” Lana walked up beside her and saw that her eyes were shut and her lips were pursed. “W-What’s wrong?”

Bobbie exhaled sharply. “I thought I had it all figured out…”

“Had _what_ figured out?”

Bobbie grinned, shook her head, chuckled humorlessly, looking at Lana. “Lana, this case… oh, how do I explain it? I-It’s like a _machine,_ you know? And all these clues… they’re like _cogs,_ you see? When you assemble the cogs, they all turn together, and they make the machine run, right?”

“Uh-huh…?”

“I thought I had the machine all assembled, but those tracks we just found…” Bobbie shook her head again, snapping her fingers. “They’re not a cog – they’re a _wrench_ thrown into the cogs, jamming them all up!”

Now Lana was a little lost. “Huh…?”

Bobbie knelt down to her level. “Lana, I thought this was an open-and-shut case of multiple homicide, but not only do I not have any suspects nor motives, now I have to deal with the possibility of the culprit not being human at all, but an animal that we can’t even identify! But those bodies were moved, gutted, stripped of anything edible, then neatly piled in a corner of the room – what kind of wild animal is _that_ thorough?” She stood up and started pacing, throwing her hands in the air. “And _how did it get in here, anyway?_ You saw those tracks yourself, Lana – they originated from _inside_ the kitchen, and there were none leading _into_ the Burpin’ Burger, only tracks leading _out!_ You’re _sure_ you and your siblings were all alone in this restaurant when you left?”

Lana nodded. “Positive.”

“Well, there you go! Where was it hiding? _Why_ was it hiding?! _It makes no dang sense!”_ Bobbie slumped into a nearby booth, massaging her temples. “…I’m _stumped,_ Lana. I’ve hit a dead end.”

Lana furrowed her brows, trying to think. They couldn’t give up – not _now,_ when they’ve made so much progress! “There’s got to be… There’s _got_ to be an explanation!”

Bobbie threw her hands in the air again. “Well, sport, at this point, your guess is as good as mine…”

Lana started pacing. Those tracks were important – she was sure about that. But what did they mean? And where did they come from? “This… _wrench…_ Maybe it’s _not_ a wrench – maybe it’s just another cog that got loose and jammed up the other cogs!”

Bobbie perked up, stunned by the six-year-old’s appropriation of her analogy. _“Heh…_ okay… But where does it go, though?”

Lana frowned, gritting her teeth. How did these things usually go in mysteries? “There… There’s got to be an answer – something we’re missing! But_ what?!”_

_“U-Uhhh…”_

Everyone jumped a foot in the air as Lucy shakily made her presence known. Shaking his head, Flip said, _“Criminy,_ kid, how do you keep_ doing_ that?! We didn’t even hear you opening the front door!”

“That’s Lucy for you.” Lana walked up to her big sister and cupped her face in her hands. “You okay, Luce? Have a good rest?”

Lucy nodded, awkwardly clinging to Lana for security. Lana embraced her, stroking her hair. “Yeah, I know, Lucy, I know… I’m sorry I had to leave you, but Bobbie needed help investigating…”

“Yeah…” Suddenly, Bobbie bolted upright, staring straight at Lucy. “Wait – that’s _it!”_

Lana broke the hug, looking at her. “Huh? What’s it?”

Bobbie stood up and made a beeline for Lucy. _“Lucy –_ you were here last night! You saw something, that’s for certain – you _must_ have seen what happened!” She clasped her hands together. “So, _please…!_ If there’s anything you can tell us,_ anything_ at all, now’s the time!”

Lucy started shaking again. Lana could see that her rest had allowed her to recover quite a bit, but she was still far from “okay.” “W… When…” she stuttered. “…When’d you go?”

Flip rolled his eyes, tossing a hand up in exasperation. “Aw, _jeez,”_ he groaned, “this again?”

Bobbie sighed. “Lucy, _please…_ I know it’s hard, but isn’t there _anything_ else you can tell us? Anything _useful?”_

Lucy separated from Lana and latched onto Bobbie’s jacket. “When’d you go? _When’d you go? When’d you go?!”_

_She just won’t stop going on about that,_ Lana thought to herself. _Why? And why is she asking Bobbie now –?_

And just like that, it nailed her. She couldn’t blame herself for not seeing it before, but she still felt stupid about it. Classic mystery trope – something insignificant that turned out to be a vital clue staring them in the face the whole time once they started thinking outside the box! Now this _really_ felt like a true murder mystery…

Meanwhile, Bobbie, bombarded incessantly by Lucy’s question repeated _ad nauseam,_ finally lost her patience with the traumatized girl. “Lucy, _please!”_ she snapped. “Either _go wait in the van,_ or _tell us something useful!”_

“I-I think she _is!”_ Lana said, interpolating herself between Bobbie and Lucy. “I think…” She turned to Lucy. “…I think she’s been trying to tell us the entire time!”

Flip raised an eyebrow. “Eh? What’re you talkin’ about now…?”

But Bobbie was curious – she thought Lana was onto something. “Lana?”

Looking at Lucy’s face, Lana could tell that yes, she _was_ trying to tell them something. Tell them _what,_ though? All she’d been saying all day was the same thing. Was that supposed to mean something? Lana tried going over it again in her head. _When’d you go… When did you go… When… did… you –_

As she sounded it out, it happened. The machine unjammed, the rogue cog slipped into place, and the gears began turning in sync. It all made sense now – the bones; the murder weapon; the blood pools; the phone; the tracks; and Lucy.

She didn’t want to believe it… but it’s the only way the case made the slightest bit of sense, no matter how nonsensical the premise was.

Bobbie’s eyes widened as she saw comprehension dawn on Lana’s face. “…You’ve got something, Lana,” she observed. “Let’s hear it.”

Lana hesitated, then slowly turned to look at first her, then Flip, then Lucy. She wasn’t sure how to tell them, so she figured she’d just tell them straight-out. “What if…” She paused. “…what if she’s not asking, ‘When did you go’?”

Bobbie leaned back. “Hm…?”

Lana took a deep breath, turned to Bobbie, and laid it out plain for her:

“What if she’s saying… _‘Wendigo’?”_


End file.
